I'm out to pretty much everyone except for my closest family. I'm trying to get myself ready to bridge the next gap and come out to my mom, but things are a little bit difficult there. While I'm almost completely positive that she'd be okay with it, we don't have the greatest relationship. We don't talk about anything, almost anything except for the weather or what we should have for dinner - sometimes even talking about school-related stress is a little too much for us. Because of that, whenever I try to just TELL her I find myself freezing up and talking about other things. Does anyone have any advice on how to come out to a parent that you can't communicate with?
I was the same way with my father. I don't know if this helps, but what I did, was I made him sit and talk with me, even though he didn't want to. He tried to walk away, and I told him, " we NEED to have this conversation." I wasn't even sure if my dad would accept it, and I still don't know if he does. Starting the conversation is the hardest part. However, if you know that the person will accept you, like you say your mom will, you will soon realize that it gets a lot easier as the conversation goes on. Who knows? Your mom may already know. Mother's tend to notice things. My mom knew that I was gay before even I did. I don't know if this helps you at all, but please keep us updated on how it goes.(*hug*) good luck!
It's like that with my dad. Although we live in the same house I rarely ever talk to him. The day I told him I went downstairs, asked if I could talk to him, and just blurted it out. I told him that I had been doing a lot of thinking and I had come to the conclusion that I was not attracted to men "in that way" and I am pretty sure that I am gay. He thanked me for being honest with him, but he was worried about me. He had always imagined me getting married to a man (to be taken care of) and whatnot. He proceeded to tell me to find a job that I am passionate about so I can take care of myself. LOL. It was pretty funny...I don't think he really knew how to take the news so he just started talking about the first thing that popped into his head. Whenever I have to tell my dad anything I find it easier to just blurt it out and get it over with. Not sure if this helps at all, but good luck. (*hug*)
Why don't you start the conversation saying something about gay issues or talking about any gay friends you have or you could talk about a GSA meeting (if you have/attend the GSA at your school). I don't know, maybe watch a movie with gay characters with her, I'm just throwing ideas around.
Thank you so much for your ideas, all of you! I'll see how it goes, and I'll keep you posted. It's my goal to come out to her before I go back to school at the end of my break. thanks again <3
If you never talk to her, do you feel it's important to do so? I don't necessarily advocating keeping your sexuality on the downlow, but for people I wasn't close to, I figured "it'll come up when it comes up". Lex
If you print out resources to give her, like from PFLAG, it will make it harder to choke and back out at the last minute, because she'll be able to see what you have in your hands. ^^ This is something to consider, but maybe consider as well whether you not being out to her may have contributed to the distance in your relationship. It can be hard to feel close to someone when there is something so important about you that you are keeping from her.
You might want to try coming out to her by a letter. That way you can get all your thoughts down and give it to her. There is a section on coming out letters.
idk if this will help but when i came out to my mom i knida made her guess it and when she said are you in love with boy i said "related to that" and then i told her and she was so understanding shes happy i told her and that our trust is that strong. remember there isnt anything you can say to your family that will make stop loveing you its important that they know i was gonna wait until is was like 18 to tell my mom i was gay but i couldent wait, now i feel so much better!
