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Is your mom living in the same household? What does she think about your dad making you leave?

 

There's an old rocker by the Rolling Stones that sums up things perfectly: Time is on My Side (or in this case- your side!) Your dad's influence over your life is very temporary.

At 15, it won't kill you not to have a boyfriend- as appealing as that might be and as unfair as it may be for him to prevent that. But it will kill you if you have to drop out of school, and to have to re-arrange where you live at during a time when it's too early for you to have to deal with that.

This may seem like weak advice but for now...just accept it. You know in your heart your dad is being unfair. You know that in time- he won't be able to control your relationships. You know that in time- you're gonna win. You'll be able to pick your own boyfriends and there won't be anything he can do about it. But for now- respect his position. I'm not saying you shouldn't be pissed. Just don't let it poison you.

Your dad may come around if you stand firm that you're gay and also stand firm in doing as he's asked (I know asked is the wrong choice of words but ultimately he is asking because you can always refuse). It may be that he needs time. Tolerating his rule doesn't mean you agree with it. It means you're mature enough to deal with injustice without allowing it to cause you to make poor choices.

All the best,

Tim

 

Even though this gross injustice goes against everything I believe I think Tim has some valid points.

I think also that communication is CAPITAL here. You have marked 'out to everyone' so your parents know about your homosexuality and have presumably accepted it. Your dad seems to be having problems with fully coming to terms with this and probably needs some help. I know you are the child and he the adult but maybe if you can talk to him or get him some books you can help him along the road to acceptance.

I think you need to talk openly to your dad saying that he knew you were homosexual but you respect his right, in his own home not to have to see you hugging your boyfriend but that you still are and always will be homosexual and that the sooner he can fully accept that the better because one day you will have a life partner and hope to visit him and enjoy the same relationship that you would have had with him if you had been straight.

My son came out to me recently, I love him and accept his homosexuality but I am not sure that I am completely ready to surprise him hugging another man in his bedroom. I wouldn't necessarily throw him out (that's not my style) but it is not something I am ready to see at the moment.

Good luck

 

You will get there Louise!

 

^Yay, kudos for teh adults

Um , like they said above, you just need time. For now, you stay under his roof, you have to follow instructions, you better make him happy, but you can spread your wings once you get older and stand on your own, you are free to do thinsg you want/like And that is the law of nature

Or Louis said, talk to your dad, convince him, stand up for yourself, gay community, but dont make things exploded

Or you can keep the connection with him through email or online

 

*Ahem*
Romeo and Julliet?
I mean your dad doesn't HAVE to know your seeing him. I don't know if your dad is the equivilant of 1984's Big Brother but most likely if you play your cards right you can have the secret kinda relationship.

Maybe get a fake girlfriend?

 

Woah, I definately wouldn't go down that road. If you ever want to have a relationship based on honesty, trust and respect you have to listen to what your dad has to say and then present him with your side of the argument if you want.

If you start lying and going behind his back it will be very difficult for you ever to have a relationship based on confidence and you will hurt your dad more that you can imagine.

Whether you agree with what your dad said and did or not, you do live under his roof and he does have the right to his opinions. Imagine if I am a smoker, I come to your house where smoking is not tolerated and I light up a cigarette anyway!! Your dad would through me out and he would be within his rights to do so.

I'm not saying that it is exactly the same thing, just that respect cuts both ways and if you want to live under his roof, that he pay your bills, clothes, food, electricity, education, etc. then there are certain rules, however unfair or unjust, that you will just have to put up with. That's life!

End of lecture :icon_bigg