I somehow got myself a girlfriend

LOL - I had to laugh at your subject line! Well, the bottom line is you are probably going to hurt her feelings, just try to do it as gently as you can and hopefully you can remain friends.

 

i'm sorry. that sounds like a tough situation. do u think she would be ok if u told her u were gay?

 

ouch I can see the tough situation you're in here Josh. Short answer is that you are going to hurt her feelings no matter what. Whether it be now, or later.

I suppose the situation you face now is, do you let it go on until you're out to your folks and then let her know that you're gay. Or, do you tell her and hope that she doesn't tell everybody in a fit of rage, because you lead her on?

Tough call mate, hope it works out

 

You shoudl tell her the truth as soon as possible before she likes you even more than now, being honest now, she may blame you later on if you dont tell her the truth, most girls always do that...

Well, um...just tell her and be patient with her

 

Yes, you can go back in time and stop yourself from starting to date her. That would be the best solution: an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

 

Can you just tell her that you want to be friends only? No reason to tell her that you're gay if you don't want to.

Hopefully she'll stay your friend. Girls can be great friends too.

I've been in your shoes a number of times and I know it's very tough. Not all stayed my friends, but a few did. A few were quite nasty, though, but those don't make for good friends anyway. One got me in trouble with my mother. It was my fault, I went along with the girl thinking that we were a couple, then one day I ended it. We remained friends once all the hurt feelings had passed. I blame myself for leading her along, very bad thing to have done, I still feel bad about it. My mother was not impressed with me at all.

The last time was a few years ago with a women that I was introduced to and I made it clear right away, but she still wasn't happy about being rejected. At least I didn't start going with her and repeating the same mistakes that I made as a youth. I still bump into her a few times a month and it's still awkward. Imagine how awkward it would be if I had lead her along! So it's best to learn young as it's going to keep happening. Good luck thenedoftime.

It's best to be honest right away, it's less trouble, believe me.

 

You have a responsibility to tell her you're gay. Why did you decide to be her "boyfriend" if you knew you were gay?

 

He didn't want to hurt her feelings, thus said yes.

(most) girls are bitches so expect a backlash of hate/death threats/bashings. >_> Or maybe you could be lucky and she'll still be your friend

 

That's an incredibly sexist and very untrue thing to say. It's about as sensible as saying all gay guy are bitches or promiscuous--which is to say, not sensible at all.

 

I was wondering when the PC police would jump on that one. But yeah, I definitely disagree. Girls can be great friends and, while we do bitch together on occasion, I've only heard one of them plotting serious revenge.

I would say tell her, and be very apologetic, but if you explain the situation to her, she'll probably understand and eventually move on. But you'll have to do it soon, because the longer you wait, the worse it will get.

 

It's less painful if you tell her soon.

Yeah, like what the others said, you don't have to tell her you're gay, maybe tell her that you're not into relationships right now

If she's the type that holds grudges, it's best not to tell her anything that you don't want to spread all over

 

Well, I agree with most of the other people that have posted here in that you really need to decide what youa re going to do quite quickly, because as the time goes on, she will probably get more emotionally attached to you, and the bad feelings will be worse if you leave it longer in my opinion

That said, I don't think the decision whether to tell her you are gay is quite so cut and dry. I think that in a fit of anger, she may reveal it to someone, etc depending on the kind of girl she is. No one here, part from you know what she's like, so I might be worried about nothing. Then again, she could be really supportive and understanding...Anyway, you could just say that you're still questioning your sexuality and you don't think dating a girl is a good idea while you're still confused about your sexuality.

I dunno, hope I helped

 

Obviously you know her better than us so you need to "dump" her in the most appropriate manner befitting her. Like others have said, you don't need to tell her any more than she needs to know and you two can still be good friends. I hope it works out for you!

 

I think if you have only just started going out with her it should be easy enough to have a chat about where you want to go with this relationship. I doubt that she is so madly in love with you (no offence meant) that her heart will be broken to the point of her plotting revenge!

She might be a little bit disappointed but that will probably be all. She won't be hurt unless you let things drag on and then she will justifiably feel silly and humiliated. It should be easy enough to talk to her and say that you enjoy her company but that you don't really want to get into serious dating, that you would like to hang out with her (if this is the case) but just as friends. If you don't really want to go out with her you could tell her that there are lots of things going on in your life at the moment, that you don't want romance at the moment and group friendship is all you can offer her.

I don't think, unless you want to, that you have to talk about your sexual orientation, this concerns you and only you, it is private untill you want it to become public knowledge and then only to the people you chose... not necessarily a light aquaintance.

 

best to dump her now rather than later, could be messy if she starts getting even more infatuated with her... just my opinion

 

just be straight with her. no pun intended. Although SOME girls are bitches, and will take it the wrong way, those particular girls would take any excuse the wrong way. if you are comfortable with her and want to be her friend, then i would say tell her, that way she knows it isnt just some line, its not that "its not you, its me, really" cause that will probably hurt her feelings, cause then she will know its her. lol. if you dont really care whether she stays in your life, then just let her down with one of those lines, be ready for some toughness, mean words, crying, depending on what kind of girl she is, and just be careful in the future. girls do know that getting involved with anyone chances them getting hurt, just like anyone else in a relationship, so it doesnt matter what you decide to do, just do what feels right and go through with the one that is truest to yourself. good luck and be cautious in the future. its better to blow a girl off at first then to lead her on!