A little less confused... but still trying to figure out the rest

So, I originally posted here a few months ago because I was confused about my sexuality. While I haven't posted recently, I have been visiting this site frequently for support. The original post has all the details, so I won't repeat them but here is a quick recap. I am a 30 year old guy who had never dealt with or come to terms with my sexuality. My original post was written when I believe I was at rock bottom and something inside of me finally clicked and I decided I needed to deal with it. Anyway, I got some great advice from everyone here and wanted to provide an update of my progress.

The biggest news is that I have now actually dated a guy and you know what, I liked it! However, I would be lying if I didn't say that I also felt a sort of loss at the same time. I originally wanted to date a guy to confirm my belief that I was in fact gay (or at least bi) and to some extent it obviously did confirm that I like guys. However, it didn't provide the complete clarity I was expecting and I still struggle with calling myself gay. What is weird is that one day I will be completely fine with it and be ready to tell the world. However, the next day, I will feel the complete opposite and feel like my world is ending. I will then start to question if I am gay and will start to notice attractive women and think that maybe I would be happy in a relationship with one of them. Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Am I just trying to fool myself because I am still having trouble dealing with the fact that I have to lose the "straight" idea of what I thought my life would be? Am I just trying to bargain with myself? Am I just crazy?!?! Ha!

I think what scares me more than anything is just telling that first person. I feel like it compares to standing at the edge of a cliff and once you jump off, there is no turning back. That really freaks me out. What if I made a mistake? I also know (from the support here) that people come out later in life but I still feel totally embarrassed by what people will think when I do tell them, since I am 30. I guess it is just something I need to work through but I am still unsure as to how. What is also interesting is that I didn't seem to have a problem with the fact that the friend's of the guy I dated all knew we were dating and hanging out as a group was not a big deal.

Anyway, that is a quick update of my progress. While it might not seem like a lot, for me these have been huge steps as I originally promised myself I would never express or deal with it at all. I definitely appreciate this forum. It has been a huge help to read other stories and writing this down seems to help me process and deal with everything.