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Cool, so I'm out, but now what?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by LumpyPrince, May 3, 2011.

  1. LumpyPrince

    LumpyPrince Guest

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    Actually I've been out for a long time, like two years. This was my first year of high school yet I've had little to none experience with dating, and I really don't know any other gay guys other then a few but there ugly and I'm so not interested. I dont know where I should I look for a boyfriend. I've had a friend with benefits but it lasted like one day because he thought I was too conceited and stuck up.
    I'm afraid I'm going to die alone and lonely.
    What should i do?
     
  2. alexi12

    alexi12 Guest

    Not many guys are going to be out in highschool. Things come up, but more often in college and later. Don't worry about never getting anyone ever, it will happen, just be patient, be yourself, and be nice, and things might happen. And try not to focus on it, there are other awesome things to look foreward to, and you want to enjoy them as much as you can.
     
  3. LumpyPrince

    LumpyPrince Guest

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    College is so far away tho ):
     
  4. zeratul

    zeratul Guest

    Well, remove your conceitedness and stuckupness, and perhaps your friend will agree to be friends again?
     
  5. alexi12

    alexi12 Guest

    The time goes by. You just have to enjoy highschool for what it is worth. There is more to enjoy in highschool. I figured that out, and I am happy and have been single for 6 months. And if I could go back and change my past, I would choose to have never had the relationship that I had. I would love to have a relationship in highschool if there was a guy that I liked, but I will be fine if I don't have one for awhile.

    Friendships are much more important in highschool. I know a relationship sounds ideal, but trust me, it isn't as good as it seems most of the time.
     
  6. LumpyPrince

    LumpyPrince Guest

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    I'm just so jealous of all of my friends because they all are dating someone and I'm like the only one brave enough to come out of the closet in my school so when all my friends blow me off for there boyfriends when there's no one for me :/
     
  7. TheEdend

    TheEdend Guest

    Like alex said, most people in high school won't come out until much later or at least senior year.

    There are two things that you can do. One is to enjoy every other aspect of your life while you are single. Enjoy your friends, family, hobbies, etc. You will have a lifetime to have has many boyfriends was you want. Enjoy your single time as well :slight_smile:

    The other is to join LGBT organizations. Do you have an LGBT center near you? Youth LGBT center maybe? GSA?
     
  8. Daryn

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    Why are there eggs scrambling in the street?
    I'm worried about being in this situation too, so you aren't alone. I'm not exactly out to everyone everyone, but I'm sure word is getting around. Hang in there. Maybe your courage will inspire someone else to come out too :slight_smile:
     
  9. alexi12

    alexi12 Guest

    What helped speed up my coming out process is that someone else in my school came out. Things sometimes happen, but you shouldn't waste time waiting. Just try to enjoy everything else there is to enjoy now :slight_smile:
     
  10. Holmes

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    Em, you're 14. Come back to me when you're 101, then it might be fair to give up hope.

    There's only so much you can do to get a boyfriend, you get to know someone and then more starts to happen. It grows then into something more. But make an effort, be open with people, reach out to them.
     
  11. Hot Pink

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    I think you need to learn to look passed looks too. Granted, you're 14, so that might be difficult, but you should at least try. Don't dismiss someone because you think they're "ugly" because you could be the one who's really missing out.

    Hard truth: looks fade. If you base who you date based on how they look or how good they are in bed or whatever, then you will be emotionally alone. Not just in the future, but in the present as well.
     
  12. Hexagon

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    Seriously, mate, I have that problem too. There is nothing you can do to find closeted gay people, just look for friends. Don't dismiss someone because you think they're ugly - in fact, don't go searching for boyfriends exclusively. Hows about making friends with the ugly guys?
     
  13. alexi12

    alexi12 Guest

    You might be jealous of relationships that are happening around you. Don't be :slight_smile:

    Relationships always look better from the outside, especially if you are really trying to be in one. And once you are in a relationship, you have to work at making a relationship work. It is worth the effort to have a good relationship, but it is not easy to have a good relationship. So there are benefits of being single, and if you can't change being single, you might as well embrace it and enjoy it :slight_smile: