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Stuck!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by whatsnormal7, May 31, 2011.

  1. whatsnormal7

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    So I have been thinking about my sexuality and I am leaning towards lesbian but I am still not sure. I have a best friend we are realllllly close. We have been best friends since we were 10 (im 16 now). I realized that I really like her but she is straight. What do I do? We are so close that the only thing she doesnt know about me is that I like her. Help. Thanks!:help:
     
  2. whatsnormal7

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    oh and she is totally ok with me being lesbian if I decide that or bi if I decide that.
     
  3. Skiel

    Skiel Guest

    Well if she is straight, nothing will happen between the two of you. So whether you tell her or not won't change a thing.
    Are you hoping that she may reciprocate the same feelings? Because that won't happen if she is definitely is straight. I wouldn't tell her because it would just be awkward knowing that I would be rejected anyways. I understand that the urge to tell her is unbearable though especially since you two share everything together, but it may be better not to tell her. Your feelings may change quickly too, you're only 16. One day your infatuation with a crush may just disappear within the next month. I know how it sucks to have a straight crush.
     
  4. whatsnormal7

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    thanks... the biggest problem is that i think i have liked her for 3 years, so im scared it wont go away...
     
  5. Skiel

    Skiel Guest

    No matter how much you love her though, she'll only love you like a sister/friend and nothing past that. If you can't get over her, then it'll only continue hurting you in the end...I'm sure you'll find somebody else one day who you will have even stronger feelings for and who will love you the same way that you love them :slight_smile:
     
  6. whatsnormal7

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    yea true... i just dont know where because im not really out and im not ready to come out
     
  7. ToTheCeilingFan

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    Jeepers hon, you have almost the exact same problem as me, right down to the age when you met the girl. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: Straight crushes suck.
    If you don't feel ready to come out yet, definitely don't push yourself. You'll know you're ready to come out when you feel comfortable with yourself and sure of your orientation. I'd recommend coming out to a friend before you come out to your family; people our age tend to be more accepting of homosexuality than our parents' generation is. Good luck and welcome to EC! :slight_smile:
     
  8. whatsnormal7

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    In have come out to 2 friends and she is one of them.
     
  9. silverhalo

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    I wouldnt tell her that you like her, I mean if you are out to her then if she was anything but straight and she had any feelings other than friendship then she would be in the best position to say something or make a move. I know its really difficult but I think your friendship with her sounds awesome and I wouldnt want to risk making it awkward.