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Does enjoying sex for the sake of it make one bisexual...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by OMGWTFBBQ, Jun 4, 2011.

  1. OMGWTFBBQ

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    in the very technical sense?

    I thought of myself as bi for years. I still crave sex with men, and I *do* actually enjoy having it, but, I guess what i'm missing is the intimacy. I don't feel attracted to a man while having sex with him, or even want to kiss him, but, I do feel aroused by the sex itself.

    I'm still not attracted to men, otherwise, but sometimes I still think I'd like to sleep with some of my close male friends. I don't do it because I just don't want to complicate things anymore...I know that nothing will really come of it and that I'll just feel dirty afterward, but does that I fact that I enjoy the sex make me bisexual regardless?

    Shouldn't I be more repulsed by it?
     
  2. Hexagon

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    In the technical sense, I would be called bisexual, given that I like both men and women. But I identify as pansexual because I feel it fits more appropriately. Really, you are what you feel you are.

    I often hear a certain quote saying that lesbians are women who love women, not women who have sex with other women. So if you feel that men are more of a convenience that love/attraction, then your a lesbian. Or whatever you want to be.
     
  3. Foxywolf

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    You could just be bi leaning gay, everyone is different. You are mainly attracted to women but enjoy having sex with men. Why not just leave it at that? Do you really need a specific label? By what it sounds like it sounds like you are MOSTLY gay, with some bisexual tenancies.
     
  4. malachite

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    We have such an odd notion of "normal" you enjoy sex with men and crave sex with women. There is nothing wrong about your feelings, I say just go with it.

    the only odd thing about sexual activity is not to have any
     
  5. concklin

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    This is one reason labels are annoying. Technically, you're bisexual, but you just prefer women more. I've never met a bisexual that is 50:50, I'm sure there are, I just don't know of any.

    The fact that you enjoy sex with both genders makes you bisexual, but you could only see yourself in a relationship with a woman, you can only be intimate with a woman, and that's fine.

    I know a bisexual girl that was in a relationship with a guy for a year or 2 but always said she sees herself ending up with a woman, but will still be with her guy for as long as she loves him. Well they recently broke up so I'm sure it's all ladies for her from now on. Nothing wrong with that.

    In the end, you call yourself what you feel comfortable calling yourself, or avoid labels and say you're sexually attracted to both men and women (if craving sex with men means you're sexually attracted to them) but overall you're more attracted to women. Your life, your label.
     
  6. GuardianKitten

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    Bisexual, lesromanitc?

    Throwing it out there...

    ---------- Post added 4th Jun 2011 at 10:42 AM ----------

    Now THAT'S offencive.
    Really, asexual people aren't "odd" or messed up like you're implying. I'm not going to threadjack, and taht was probably an innnosent comment, but THINK before you say things.
     
  7. Just Passing

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    Now I've never had sex with anyone, but even I am slightly attracted to the female body and find it intriguing to look at. But am I attracted? No, so I know I'm definitely gay.

    That being said, depending on what feelings you hold overall, you can still technically class yourself as gay, whilst enjoying the thought of the other sex.
     
  8. TheEdend

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    Techinically you are bisexual since you are attracted to both genders.

    You shouldn't be anything. The only rule to be gay/lesbian is to like the same gender. Nothing more, nothing less :slight_smile:
     
  9. IanGallagher

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    I'd say technically bi. It would take a lot for me to go out with a guy, although it's still very possible since I'm attracted to them and have had just as many crushes on them in the past. There are even days/hours where I lean more towards guys. But, overall I usually lean towards girls more and see that being where I'll wind up because that remains the most constant with the "ebb and flow" (bi term, actually). The one thing that caught my attention though is you said you're not attracted to guys outside of sex? If walking down a street, do you check guys out sometimes or think "he's hot!" I react that way towards both... so is just a sex thing or do you also find some guys attractive? If that's the case, more lez than bi, like a Kinsey 5 would probably be it.
     
    #9 IanGallagher, Jun 5, 2011
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2011