Can't Cope

First you need a big hug. (&&&)

Now listen, I hope my words will help but even though we are words and letters on a computer, we're all here for you. You are NOT alone. I understand how you feel, I've been there, I know what it's like when it feels like the world is caving in on you but you need to tell yourself that this too will pass. Life is going to throw you curve balls, but you have to remember something, they're just hurdles for you to pass and YOU WILL PASS THEM. It may not seem like it right now, but you have more strength in you than you can imagine because that's who we are as gay men and women. Even if perhaps you are not being picked on or talked about in relation to your sexuality, those before us have weathered things that has set the stage for us to be strong. If you need to see someone, then do it, seek out a counselor to help you. But remember that you can get through this. We're all going to be here for you, and we're not going to leave you. I know you think it would be easier to roll your car off a hill, but then think of all the opportunities you'll miss out on! You were also given that supervisor position because the people who gave it to you see exactly what I see, someone who has the strength, and the heart to be able to do it. Maybe it is alienating, but you want to know why? Because the people under you are morons who have no merit to that sort of position. YOU were given the position because YOU have that merit. If you need someone to turn to, come to us because we will ALWAYS be here for you. I promise you, as corny as it may sound, it WILL get better. One of these days those people who talked about you, those people who didn't give you their friendship, will be craving it. Why? Because you will be at the top, you will be the one who can deny them (I know kind of negative but still saying you will have that power), and YOU WILL BE AMAZING.

Remember, we love you and will always be here.
<3 Revan

I am off to bed as its almost 4AM but I promise you I will read your reply as soon as I wake up. Be strong. (*hug*)

 

Hey there,

First off, you're not failing at anything so don't be so hard on yourself. You should be proud for earning the promotion! My situation is kind of similar...just moved to a new city and my friends that were here have moved away for work or school so now I'm at a new job in a new city with no one around. It's totally lonely and there are more than a few days where it feels like driving my car into the lake would be easiest. But what I tell myself when that happens is that I know that's not true. It's already been said, but these situations take time, patience, and effort to get through (which sucks, 'cause when you're feeling numb and overwhelmed and lonely those are usully in short supply). Have you tried volunteering somewhere as a way to meet new friends? Its kind of a win win 'cause you'll either make friends or at least stay busy so you wont focus on how crappy you feel. Or an online profile? They don't always have to be looking for dates. I've seen plenty from people who are new to town and looking for friends. And ignore the people at work. Seriously, they don't get to dictate how you're supposed to feel. They say you're insensitive or cold? Well, unless you're working at a day care center or teddy bear hugging testing facility it's not your job to be smiles and lollipops, but some people will just never get that. I just got promoted last week and the pettiness from coworkers is starting up here too.

When you feel the way you describe I know it's easy to just hole up at home but then it becomes a vicious cycle 'cause you're not going to meet people that way and it won't just get better on its own. I'm new to this site but I'm finding people are willing to listen, so don't hesitate to vent if you need to!

 

You should not be down on yourself. You got a promotion, so you are doing something right. I know it can be hard moving to a city where you know no one, but hang in there. It will get better.

 

i seriously cried when i read this because you remind me too much of myself...listen. i know exactly how you feel. 95% of the time, i feel heavy, like i just want to sink into the earth. the blood in my veins feels hot and heavy, and i used to cut myself to make myself feel more. if anything, it only brought myself more problems- my ex homophobic "best friend" blew up at me one day and threatened to tell everyone that i cut. i felt suicidal and sad all the time, and the only thing that made me feel remotely better was that time passes, things change, and one day the people around me change. please hang in there. you don't need to change, everyone else does. you are beautiful and perfect the way you are, and one day, the world WILL change. it has to. think about it; one day african americans weren't slaves anymore, women had rights, and we LGBTrs will have it all too.