Chapter I'mtoolazytonamethese

I think it's a good idea for your Dad to go to at least some therapy sessions with you. Definitely not all of them, but every once in a while couldn't possibly hurt, could it? We need to think positive right now Miyu. At least he went to one. That's more than most parents are willing to do, and with time and a little education perhaps he will come around. We all need a support group, and like it or not your father has to be a part of that in some form or another.

If you get fired you get fired. There are other jobs out there. It really isn't the end of the world. It's annoying, yes, and it's a real hassle, yes, but life is full of things like this so we just have to do what we have to do and move on. You don't even know if you're going to get fired for sure yet either so let's not jump to conclusions or assume anything for right now.

Suicide is never an option either by the way, so you're only left with one; transition. I fully support you every step of the way and I hope that I've helped you at least a little bit. (*hug*)

 

Everything has a way of working out. Like I said, we need to be positive right now.

Trust me, I totally understand the father thing, but you're just wrong on this. I know it sounds sappy, like a hallmark card, but everyone has a journey and a story and we all have something to contribute back to our communities and you do too. So, things haven't been that great up to this point, but things will get better in the future if you let it and make the effort. Imagine yourself 20+ years from now. You could transition and help someone else who will probably go through the same thing you're going through right now. This suffering and tribulation has a goal and a purpose. Once you come out on the other side of this you will be such an amazingly strong person. You're 16? You're already stronger and smarter than I am and I can guarantee you that much.

I think the first thing you should do is allow your father to join you in some therapy sessions though. If you constantly push him away and let this hate come between you, however well-deserved you may think it is, it will only make the situation exponentially worse down the road. You have to fix this somehow and I think therapy is the way to make that happen. Get everything out in the open. Don't just tell him how you feel but explain how you feel, over and over again until he gets it.

 

If you dislike your father so much, why are you having him come in on your therapy sessions? Do you need him to help fund your therapy and potential transition?

 

Thank God I live in Ontario. OHIP still covers SRS so at least I'm OK for now as far as vaginoplasty goes. I have no idea if it covers breast implants, but I am fairly certain it does not cover electrolysis hair removal or facial feminization surgery. Still doing the research myself, but I will ask if therapy is covered when I finally have the courage to call the therapist & make my first appointment...

And please don't hurt yourself. I feel pretty desperate at times & I will admit that I have had thoughts of hurting myself too, but I am so glad that I haven't. If I had, I would never have come to the day where I finally accepted myself, never would have seen the day where I decided I am definitely going to begin the process to fully transition & especially would have missed the chance to really be me! I will admit, I could have lived without the Harper re-election in May tho...

 

I just shave constantly right now, but because I haven't actually come out to anyone here yet, I haven't shaved my arms or legs yet. It is sooo nice not to have underarm hair, it's so much cleaner, but i'm wondering if I should maybe start using those Veet wax strips. Hopefully someone here already has & can give me an opinion about it one way or the other.

I was pretty sure that the provincial ONT gov't added SRS back under coverage of OHIP some years ago. I remember hearing about it because several of my coworkers at the time were complaining about losing eye exam coverage but getting SRS coverage instead. I, of course, pretended to be outraged, but I was really happy to hear that it was covered. Perhaps it has been removed again, I'll have to check somewhere. I am definitely thrilled that HRT is covered!

As for breasts, I'm pretty sure both my mother & sister are both at least C cups, so if the hormones do their thing, I should have some nice breasts hopefully!

Not sure about the cost of therapy as the website of the therapist I'm wanting to see says cash or cheque & payment must be made at time of appointment. Again, I will definitely have to see if therapy is covered, as it would give my bum part of the little push it needs to call & schedule my first appointment!

 

Don't despair too about your dad- just the fact that he's coming to your therapy thing means that he cares about you right? and think about it this way: if you can forgive him for the past, than maybe it would be easier for him to accept you the way you are.

and about the hairless thing, i just started using an at home waxing kit (because the sound of shaving my legs sounded a little annoying, ya know, 'cause of stubble). It works really great, and it gives your skin a super sexy smooth, feminine feel. I can't remember the name of it, 'cause I only tried it once, but there are several products and I imagine that the end result is all the same. it really hurts at first, but the irritation goes away after a few hours or so.

good luck with your dad!!! I hope all goes well (*hug*)

 

Thanks so much for the info re waxing bookworm43. I really want to try it but I'm afraid of getting rid of the body hair of my arms & legs & then having people make fun of me. My hometown is extremely unaccepting of gay people & for me it'd be worse because I'm a pre-op girl & I'm gay. I went to Walmart yesterday & went all the way to pharmacy determined to buy a lady's razor & shave creme, lady's deodorant & some wax strips. I even wanted to look at some underwear & bathing suits & just walked right on by, avoiding contact with it all. I got all the way to the aisle, stood there for a couple of minutes staring at all the products & then totally chickened out. I'm such a coward...

 

no you're not! stand tall and proud! one day you can move from your hometown, right? are you planning on moving? if you are, than your neighbors can go fuck themselves! you'll never see them again! you can be where you want to be. and being i girl, i understand how important it is to not only look your best for all the lovely girls out there but FEEL your best, and you will only feel your best when you be yourself. you are NOT a coward, this is just new to you. ignore the people who make fun of you, they are simply not worth your time. feel excited about it! I remember shaving my underarms for the first time and wearing makeup for the first time and feel psyched, like i was passing through some gates into the secret club of being a woman, and it felt SO good. do not let your snobbish neighbors screw that up for you! you know who you are inside, and that's all that matters. (*hug*)

 

ack i'm sorry...ahaha *makes awkward laughter in an attempt to ease the awkwardness, fails pathetically*...i fail :eusa_doh:

 

oh, I'm so sorry Miyu!!! At least GRS is covered in BC! The lousy thing as far as I can tell is that the only doctor performing GRS surgeries in Canada is Dr Menard in Quebec, although I think Dr Brassard is licensed in Michigan now, so hopefully I wouldn't have to go that far if I can get to that point...

This is just based off of the research I have done so far, which admittedly isn't much. Hopefully I'm wrong and there are more available professionals out there!

I have heard that Suporn is absolutely fabulous for vaginoplasy surgery & is highly recommended by his patients. Unfortunately, he's in Thailand...

 

nyaaa i feel guilty!! (*hug*) im sorreee :icon_redf (that's supposed to be an embarassed emotocon, i believe)