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I'm....Depressed :S

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Revan, Jul 5, 2011.

  1. Revan

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    So I can't write long as I have to catch a bus, but I'm feeling depressed these days. I feel like everything's so monotonous and unappealing and nothing is going the way I want it to. I have an amazing boyfriend but because I let my mother's opinions influence me, I'm starting to doubt my relationship which I hate because he's awesome and yet my mother constantly criticizing him to me makes me just feel like shit, because I'm not meeting her standards. Every time I'm with him I feel happy, but soon as we part, my mind returns to that. It's like...being with him reaffirms how happy I am dating him, but then I get home and Mom has another crap thing to say about him and that just puts me back into a mood of doubt. I really don't know what to do here because last time I told Mom off for picking on Steve she went into one of her rages and I hate those even more. So I'm at a crossroads here guys. Do I tell Mom off and potentially hurt my relationship with her, or do I stay silent and let her send me further into this feeling of crapness.
     
  2. Just Passing

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    Hmm, sounds rather difficult.

    I'd say ask why your mother has such issues with your boyfriend and if they can potentially be resolved in any way. You shouldn't have to dump your boyfriend, due to her negative influence and you should rightly have both in your life.

    I wish you good luck with resolving this. :slight_smile:
     
  3. Jim1454

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    I'm not sure what to suggest either. I know it's easier said than done to ignore what your mother says, but that's what you need to do. That's tough, because she is your mother. We're trained to listen to our mothers, because they kept us from freezing ("Take your hat!"), from gettin hit by a bus ("Hold my hand!"), and starving to death ("It's supper time!").

    But you're no longer a little kid, and as hard as it is, you need to start to discount what your mom is saying so that it doesn't bother you.
     
  4. mnguy

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    Like Jim said, is it possible to ignore what she says? Is what she says true at all? It seems like if there is no truth to what she says it would be easier to ignore. Maybe you notice some of what she is criticizing and that makes you doubt being with him, but maybe these are little things and she'll always find something to complain about because she doesn't want to let you go to a guy. Maybe it's her defense mechanism to keep you with her.

    Without knowing what she's saying about him and whether there is any truth to it, it's hard to say how to handle it. I will say that she should mind her own business if she's complaining about little foibles that we all have and if she's pointing out bigger faults, she should talk to you in a more respectful manner.

    Take care (*hug*)