So a senior in my high school--who just graduated--named Matt is a good friend of mine and I would go to his lunch table and sit with his friends and tell funny stories and jokes and him and his friends loved me for it. But I noticed him staring at me frequently while I'd be telling my stories. Every day. And he'd pull me close to him with his thumb touching my chin, which I thought was romantic in a way. And around Christmas time he told me "All I want for Christmas is you" and I smiled at him. Considering the fact that he has a girlfriend--named Paige, and shes going to college in Maryland in the fall. His girlfriend barely noticed but I was great friends with her too so I guess I got her approval lol So was he joking or serious? And on his facebook in his about me section he wrote "chris is still my husband and my son andrew has the dick of a dinosaur!" Btw I am only Matt's Facebook friend and I just sent him a message saying "matt <3 hey whatsup" and I'll post an update if he answers back. And I added him on his Gmail because I have one too. And I've seen his Facebook pics. He has 350 pics of him. About 20 are at the hotel he stayed at after prom with Paige. He kisses her in a lot of them. Took pics with his friends too and he took some of his sexy muscles lol. Btw I'm a sophomore in high school and he just graduated So he might be in college and I can't contact him... what should I do about that? I've sent him messages on Facebook before and he doesn't answer them. :tears: Now that it's the end of the year I just carefully thought about him liking me real hard, harder than during the school year. And I don't want to lose him as a friend or as a potential lover. :icon_sad: So is this a bromance or does he like me like me? He doesn't know I'm bi and I have no way of telling him besides Facebook!! :tears:
He sounds bi. I have yet to see a purely straight guy act like that. Reminds me of the quarterback and me in high school, same grade lol. Still on facebook, it says he's straight. But, locker rooms all the guys joked that he was gay. He flirted with me first, like touching - smile - everything. I became his central focus in all his gym plays where he took his shirt off too. I wish today I had the courage to ask him what was going on. Basically, I'd say find out what you can and go for it dude. I've been in bromances, they're really not that intimate touchy feely. Just understanding on the pure bro level. Like Damon & Affleck or any other Hollywood duo (Stiller & Owen, etc.). More wing-man type getting girls and professionally.
It could be bromance or he could be wanting to experiment which is why he is getting so close, its hard to say
I've seen bromances where guys can get affectionate - even cuddle - it just depends on what type of guy they are. If he is in a relationship I would in general assume he's not into you - if they break up and he contacts you and makes it seem like he likes you then I would reconsider. But as of right now if he's with a girl, even if he is bi, I wouldn't expect too much =/ I'm really sorry though
1st he has a girlfriend which means he is NOT single. so whether he is gay or straight or bi doesn't matter because he is not single and why would you be trying to get with someone that's in a relationship. some of these things do sound a bit bi-curious but who knows. don't waste energy thinking about it. when you are in these "is he gay or bi or isn't he" obsessive moments remember one thing.....when a guy likes you, he will let you know. for instance, you like him, and you are the one facebook messaging him and trying to contact him. you are not saying "hey i'm gay" but you are showing initiative to get more time with him. is he doing that for you....NO. so leave it alone and move on. does he like you? who knows. He could have a major crush on you and he could not. but the one thing he isn't doing is contacting you back. if he was interested, he would. on to the next....
I would disagree a little bit with feelindown. I think it's very possible that your friend is gay and closeted, or bi... and is struggling with how he feels. If he is gay, then he may be also struggling with the relationship he currently has, so reaching out to him, just to talk and be friends, would not necessarily be a bad thing. But I do agree that he should be off limits as far as a relationship (or even a hookup) unless/until he's ended his current relationship. I also disagree that guys will necessarily let you know if they're interested if they're closeted. They can be really struggling with their feelings and go back and forth, one minute being open and ok, as he appeared to be when he said "all he wanted for christmas was you", and the next minute being nonresponsive if he's feeling vulnerable or uncomfortable. But you can't really do anything about it. You've messaged him and he hasn't responded. Perhaps if you see him somewhere you can say "hi" and just see what happens from there, but I wouldn't obsess, I wouldn't stalk him, and I wouldn't rule out other possibilities... just be patient and see what happens.
as someone who has had my fair share of crushes on so-called straight guys i can tell you that its not worth putting energy into this. chip is right. he may be into you and then he may have gotten scared or vulnerable and backed off. who knows. the main thing is that you are going to put yourself into this zone of wondering and wishing and hoping and reading into things. just be a friend and be there to talk if they want to talk. but you have to put any chance of things working out of your mind. if they do, great. but dont start hoping or that. you will only make yourself crazy in the process and will be devasted if they dont go your way.
Sorry to spoil your hopes but I don't think he likes you like that, it could be that it's just his way of being and he's just nice like that to everyone. I've had that feeling a few times too, but it's probably just myself trying to belive something that's not there. He also has a girlfriend and is going post secondary so alot of things have changed in his life and thus has no time to really chat with you anymore. By the way, maybe sending him too many messages on fb may make him annoyed so it's best that you wait a while if he does respond. I hope everything turns out well for you! but remember that you'll eventually meet other guys if this doesn't work out.
I'm gonna say he's straight. He doesn't know you're bi, and since he doesn't know that, then he'd be much more likely to mess with you like that. Straight guys joke around like that all the time. Plus, he has a girlfriend.
He LITERALLY broke up with his former gf, contacted me and makes it seem like he likes me. And my passion for him has grown times 10000. I've made a ton of posts about Matt since this one. Check out my profile to see! Donald
Well I am friends with this one guy, who doesn't know I am gay. He is also my best friend on campus, so he would always make gay slurs like "I want you baby" and you put his hands on my thigh and joke about having sex. Iv'e come to find out that is the heterosexual way of joking around homo erotically. Your friend can either be joking around or be gay. Your friend seems to be joking with you and not gay Also all my straight guy friends would always post pictures on social websites kissing girls as equivocating them as trophies. That seems the case with your friend. To add to that: When I was homophobic in my earlier stages and did not want to listen to "gay music", my other friend would say "If you feel confident about your sexuality and who you are then you have nothing to worry about" So he may be straight and feels confident about himself being straight and is joking around with you because he knows he can not be changed.
You're right. But he would say those things IN FRONT of his girlfriend and she wouldn't even blink a lash at him. She'd usually be studying or doing an assignment and she barely talked to us at all. But I don't wanna be closed minded again, as I have been with guys in the past, and say that he's automatically straight. Because life doesn't work that way, even though probably 90% of people in this world are straight. I think he's possibly bi, because he's had a girlfriend yet he reached out to me after he broke up with her, and now we see each other and talk every day. I have massive feelings for him, and it's not just because he's physically attractive. When I told him I'm a songwriter--what I never told him was that I've written songs AND poems about him, to get my feelings on paper creatively and cohesively--he had such genuine interest in me. He asked me great questions; "What type of songs do you write about?" and I answered "Oh, I don't know [that's a lie because I DID know] songs about my life I guess." That is true. I write about what I've experienced in life and make it flow creatively and cohesively so that people will understand my feelings about the subject matter and that I know what I'm talking about makes sense. Because how can I write about something fake, something not real, something that I made up? Inside my heart, it would feel unjust and not right to do that. Anyway back to the love of my life. I've been working on coming out to him TOMORROW and possibly telling him I'm attracted to him. Sexually, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Guy's will usually reach out to other friends after a break up. The reason is because they have alot more free time. I think if he was straight that he would say that in front of his girl friend. My friend would. If he and his girlfriend have a trusting relationship then I think he would because they know they are not going to go around cheating on each other. He might be interested in writing now because he learned a skill of writing from you. Trust me, I was in the same boat as you. And closeted. But when my Gay friend told me "Are you sure that you are not thinking you want him to be gay". I realized that I was so into this guy, I made a fake image of him in my mind. I'm not saying you should not come out to him, but to take it a bit slower till you're sure. What do you think could be the possible outcomes if you come out to him and tell him you are in love with him? could the outcomes be one of the following: shock, anger, fear. happiness, relief, hope?
I've done everything to get him out my mind: Writing ANOTHER poem, listening to my favorite songs for hours, watching TV, going online. Nothing has worked. And also the only thing I'm gonna do for right now is come out to him. That's it. I realize I can't tell him I love him--even though I want to sooo damn badly; he's the Spencer Tracy to my Katharine Hepburn (how I think of us)--so I'll try to hang out with him as a friend and do something with him. We could go to the movies as friends, go shopping, go see a music concert, attend some shows. The Warped Tour--even though I'm not heavily into rock music--comes through my state (New Jersey) every June or July too. Also should I ask him if he's straight or not? I didn't want to because I thought that would make him distant from me, and I don't want that; I want him to be close to me; as a friend or more. I want him to know that if he has any problems he can come to me, and vice versa. The only thing now that needs to happen is for these next 4 hours to go by quickly because I need wake up for school at 5:35 lol. (Here it's 1:35am)
I would not ask if he is straight right after you come out to him. That would make it obvious that you like him. Try to asses the atmosphere after you come out to him. And if you feel that he accepts you and that he still shows interest in you after a few days, then consider asking him.
Well how you come out(bi or gay) is out of my wisdom. Hopefully someone will provide you that wisdom before you start school. I hope everything works out for you though!
Thanks. But the only reason I haven't come out to him yet is because I get so nervous when I'm around him, that when I talk to him I say everything else except what I say I wanted to discuss. Now I'll have to be a trooper and just say the words and hope for a positive reaction.
