This is my first post, and it is certainly worth saying that I'm questioning. Most of the questions I have can only be answered through introspection and solitude, but I'm reaching out because the further I go down the path to discovering my true self/sexuality, I notice more and more questions which are better left to those with some experience in the community, 'queer-elders' if you will (lol). I'm wondering if anyone ever goes back, as in, completely and truthfully does an about-face, from hetero to homo and back again, when it comes to their sexuality. This is proving difficult to articulate, so bear with me. Do you know anyone who has set out to discover their LBTG selves and made it to the other side only to learn they are actually fully heterosexual? From my understanding this doesn't happen often. With that said, and with the knowledge that I'm trying to work my way out of denial, I think I've found a solid floor to stand on... Just by the simple fact that I'm fully questioning my orientation, and have been for years, means that I am likely not heterosexual? Is this sound reasoning? I feel like the moment I allowed myself to picture living a lesbian lifestyle and liked what I saw, was the moment that I decided I wasn't completely hetero. The second I considered that it is in fact okay to be delighted at the sight of a beautiful women and not to repress that feeling, then I have done half of the work already. What do you think? Now that I know how I feel about women, now I suppose all that is left is to come to a conclusion about my attraction toward men. After that....I come out. Do I have a point here, or are these just the insane ramblings of a confused little lady?
It sounds like its possible that you are not totally heterosexual but it may be that you are just curious or really comfortable with yourself. It will take you exploring that to fully be sure and also know that if you are Bi you may be fluid like myself were you like the same sex at some point and then prefer the opposite at another. I find myself going back and forth some times. Its all really up to you and how you explore that is up to you as well. Just know that this place is great and the people are very supportive. Oh and one last thing love the user name any particular reason you chose it?
I'd agree. It may just be that you are curious or bisexual. The thing I always like to remind myself of is this idea of a spectrum, and that sexuality indeed does fluctuate. I do identify with bisexuality right now, and if people ask (excluding my parents) I will tell them, but as I go day to day (literally) between being attracted to guys and being attracted to girls, I am forced to admit that I really don't even know myself too well. I'm still figuring out my bisexuality, honestly. It took me a long while to get to the point where I could look at a guy and admit, wow, he's actually really attractive, and it's okay to see a guy that way. It really does take time. But that's what life is for. I think you have the right idea. Ponder. Explore. See what's really out there, and then make an informed decision for yourself. But no rush. Enjoy this crazy roller coaster ride that we call life. And I do hope you don't take these for the teen-angst ramblings that they probably are!
