So I finally came out to my cousin who is also one of my best friends about a week ago. And this was after it finally got to the point where I couldn't hold it in any longer. I couldn't keep lying to myself and trying to convince myself that I'm straight when it was obvious that i wasn't, but I was so deep in denial that i just didn't wanna face it. But anyway i told my cousin and he took it way better then I expected him to. He was really accepting. That made me feel so much better, to finally tell someone. After that i felt like i wanted to tell the whole world, because i've been keeping it in for so long i just wanted to let it all out. everytime i think about telling someone else i get really scared and start freaking out. I guess i think they won't except me. I really want to tell two of my best friends who are pretty much like my brothers and i pretty much tell them everything, yet i'm really scared to come out to them. which sounds stupid if i really think about it. they should except me if they truly care, but another part of me doubts all that.. but i did tell another one of my friends who is bi through a message on FB. she hasn't responded yet:icon_sad:. Then when i start doubting myself and freaking out the part of me that thinks i'm straight pops up and confuses me even more. HELP!! (I know this might not have the best grammar and spelling in the world, but i just needed to get this out. oh and sorry for the length.)
If your friend is bi then I doubt he will reject u. What specific things make u still question your sexuality?
honestly i don't think its so much questioning as it is a part of me still holding out hope that i could still somehow be straight.
It's normal to feel liberated, but still maybe a bit scared because of all the "what if" situations you think of when you first start coming out. Many people gain more and more confidence as they come out to more people- trust in yourself and don't over-think it too much, you"ll be fine
Don't worry about it so much, usually ppl respond better then you would believe. I was freaking out too when I was going through the initial stages of coming out, it didnt get much easier until the 3rd or 4th person I told (Although each response helped boost my confidence). Best of Luck to You
thanks that helps a little. I know it'll get better, its just getting up the courage to tell more people. It also really helps to see that I'm not the only one thats going this. So i'm not going completely insane
UPDATE: so I just came out to another one of my cousins. She totally didn't believe me at first. But after she finally did, she was totally ok with it. I feel really good now. Even tho i've only told two ppl, i think i'm starting to get more confidence.
UPDATE: So i finally told one of best friends and he was totally ok with it. He said that it doesn't change anything. That was really awesome b/c i really freaking about that. I also told someone else. Wasnt really planning it, it just sorta came out. It went good as well. It does feel good to get it out and tell people, but after i told these last two people it doesn't feel as good as when I told the first two. I think a small part of me is still having doubts. But what I think it is, is that i'm still not entirely comfortable with being out yet. It still feels really weird. Thoughts?
That's wonderful. It's amazing how liberating it is to tell someone and see them accept you. On the straight feeling. I used to get that often. But then I think about a couple of the guys I had major crushes on. The way my heart would pound when we hug or he puts a hand on my shoulder. The way a would feel happy just by seeing him. And I try and remember if I ever felt that way about a girl. And I never have. That's what made it sink in for me. Your case might be different and it's very possible that you might be bisexual? Have you considered that?
Yeah it does feel pretty awesome having someone you tell accept you. Sometimes makes me feel stupid for freaking out so much. I thought I liked girls when I was younger, but i think that was only because I was doing what I thought was "right" and "normal". But as I've gotten older I've realized that the feeling the I like guys only grows stronger. I pretty much only notice guys in a sexual way. And when I'm with my friends I never notice the girls they think are hot. And honestly I can't see myself with a girl. whenever i think about it, it seems like my mind seems to go to the guy i currently have a crush on at that time:icon_wink. But I do have anxiety and self-confidence issues, that doesn't help matters any. But i do think once i become more comfortable with being out and come out to more people things should get better:icon_bigg
