i was just starting to not care what people thought about me. i was starting to gain some confidence. and was taking steady baby steps out of the closet. ever since dinner tonight, all i wanna do is run back in, shut the door, and lock it. i was having dinner with my grandparents and sister (my family doesnt know im gay). and they started talking about my Uncle C, and how he is gay. They said they dont understand gay people. and acted repulsed. i wasnt going to start up on gay issues because i dont want them to suspect im gay. what i did do was this: grandma was trying to decribe my uncle R (uncle C's husband). she just said, "C's.. well, whatever he is". and i corrected her by stating he was his husband. she didnt seem to agree, and said she thinks its better for gay people to refer to their significant others as 'partners'. i tried to explain that C and R are legally married, but they just kind of dismissed the fact. im sad because i was thinking about coming out to my sister soon. but she obviously isnt too cool with gay people. i feel lost. can you give me some advice? maybe on how to educate them about homosexuality without coming off as gay? or how to come out to my sister and show her that being gay isnt a disgusting thing? i need some help . my sister wants to hang with me tomorrow, and i think its a good opportunity to come out/bring up homosexuality.
I'm sorry that this dinner made you feel like you want to go back into the closet, but I just want to say that from the beginning of this post you seem to be doing really well and I'm really happy for you. I had something like this when I went over to my grandparents house. I don't know how it was brought up but my grandma said something along the lines of "Since it's been made legal, they're everywhere!" and then my grandad made a similarity with paedophilia, something like "Well, yeah. If we legalize paedophilia then they'll be everywhere too." and it made me feel really upset. However, my parents know I'm bisexual and my dad tried to be as defensive as he could, as did I because I get really heated with this subject regardless of who I'm talking to. But I can definitely understand how this isolated you and made you feel like it's not a good idea to come out. Educating people about homosexuality and LGBT issues doesn't really mean that that person is gay. You can be 'straight against hate'. It's like ... if you're against racism towards black people, doesn't mean you're black, or just because you're against discrimination against people with mental health issues, doesn't mean you have mental health issues. If you want to come out to your sister tomorrow, I suggest you really find out what her stance on it is. According to your post your sister didn't really say anything, so maybe if you find out what she thinks of it and then decide if it's a good idea. You're only 17, so if you come out to your sister knowing she isn't going to be very supporting, she may even tell your parents and you're still living with them. Maybe bring it up like; "Remember the other night, over dinner we were talking about homosexuality, what did you think of it again? I can't remember if you said anything." and just see what she says. If she gets defensive you can just say that you're curious, that's all. Then, go from there. I also suggest waiting for an expert or mod on here to answer you because it'll probably more professional as they're better at giving advice. xD But I hope this helps. x
