Any gay men here who originally thought they were bi?

Not really. When I first discovered I liked guys, I thought "Wow, I'm gay or bi". But it was soon pretty clear only one group was doing to for me...

Lex

 

I thought I was bi when I first discovered my attraction towards men. As soon as I stopped fighting it, women just weren't doing it for me. Then I realized women never did, I made it all up in my head as an attempt to fit in.

 

This is basically what I went through...I just had a somewhat long gap between discovery and acceptance. :eek:

(!)

 

I used to think I might be bi before I realized that I was gay. My reason for being confused was that no one ever explained the idea of sexual attraction to me, so all I had to work with for figuring out my sexuality was the incredibly vague idea that "gay men love other men the way most men love other women". I had no idea what form that "love" was supposed to take, so I thought my close friendships with my female acquaintances, compounded with my attraction to men, qualified me as bisexual. It wasn't until I realized that I had never been sexually attracted to a woman that I finally figured out that I was gay.

As far as figuring out what your sexual orientation is, as xequar says, "The proof is in the porn." It's a crude way to figure out your sexuality, but if you do look "supplementary material" while masturbating, no matter what form it takes, that can be an easy way to figure out what sexes your are attracted to. If both men and women give you that tingly feeling, you're bi; if only men do, you're gay.

 

Same here.

 

Not once did I ever consider myself bisexual, only ever straight, straight with gay thoughts, asexual and finally gay. No idea why I never thought about bisexuality, it's not that I don't believe in it, it just didn't feel right for me.

 

Since I spent most of my life liking girls, once I started to realize I liked guys I concluded that I was probably bi. I spent about five months under the belief that I was bi before I started to doubt my attraction to girls.

What Gamer am I said about considering what kind of porn turns you on is something I can realate to; it was my interest in gay porn and yaoi hentai that made me seriously consider my sexuality.
And, embarassed as I am to say it, my interest in straight porn seems to be less about the girl than what the girl is doing to the guy or what the guy is doing to the girl. So identifying with the girl might be what turns me on, too. So I can understand some of what you're saying.

 

I think that is a fairly common situation, though it didn't happen that way for me.

 

I first thought i was Bi and it was more out of a lack of experience and understanding than anything. When i finally did get involved with men i figured out what i had been missing out on with women. While i have developed emotional connections with women i have never felt a physical one like i have with a guy. Also the fear of being ostracized, and not having children made me want to believe that i was capable of having a healthy relationship with a women when i really can't have one in the same way i can with a man. However when i learned that i could still have kids, and came to further understand things like the fluidity of sexuality, and the kinsey scale and other sexualities outside of gay/bi, I was capable of placing myself as queer. I now understand that regardless of my exact feelings i would prefer to be with a man.

 

cdkhaven, you make good points. yes, i think fear and society play into keeping people to color within the lines. i often wonder if these things were not in place how many people would color outside the sexual lines. as i get older i think i realize that more and more, please are neither black or white in terms of sexuality. everyone is a shade of grey. some darker, some lighter. however, we are socialized to beleive that weveryone should be one shade. with so many colors in the spectrum of the rainbow, how could one expect sexuality to be so black and white. anyway, i think i knew something was differnet when i started having crushes on popular guys in my school but keeping it a secret. even then i knew that was off limits. these feelings persisted over time into adulthood. maybe you are bisexual, maybe you are gay, maybe you are straight. who knows. the main thing is not to try and label yourself and to realize that if you are contemplating this there are 10 more poeple like you doing the same thing. many of those people you probably already know. as far as racy movies. i do recall even as a child when they would have those hbo movies on, i recall being very curiuos about what the guy looked like versus the girl. maybe that was because they were hiding it and would show her. who knows.

 

Thought I was bi when I found out I was attracted to men. And that's what I came out as. After my break up with my first boyfriend, I wasn't interested in any girls who showed interest in me. After a couple weeks with my next one, I realized I cared less about girls. Once I watched a movie that had boobies, I looked down and said, "huh." So I went as gay hence forth. Identifying myself as bi was just my transition toward acceptance. That transition all happened when I was 18.

 

I think I always knew I was totally gay, but that didn't stop me from lying to myself about it for a couple of years.

 

I'm the other way around. I used to think I was 100% but now I'm probably more like 95% gay or something.

 

I thought I was bi originally.
Even when I accepted that I'm attracted to men, I was kind of in denial of not being attracted to women, and would persuade myself that I like certain celebrities that I knew were hot when really it was all just denial because I didn't want to be completely gay - people are a lot less iffy of bisexuals than gay men around here

 

I am new here, so I do not know much about the site. So I am just going to jump right in here.

When I found I had an attraction to guys I was afraid. My parents never really talked about sexuality with me, or my brother so all I had to go by was what was shown in TV. At the time it was allot of gay hate, and religious groups so I thought what I felt was wrong. For years I tried, and tried to convince myself I liked women not guys. After that did not work I tried to convince myself I was bisexual so I at least sill had a chance of being accepted. Finally my parents found out. They set me down and talked to me about it. They gave me all there support. They told me liking guys was not a bad thing, and no matter what they loved me, and would be behind me all the way. Realizing it was not wrong to be attracted to men I soon realized I was not bisexual, I was just trying to force myself to like women just to fit in, and not be hated.

I hope this helped. Like I said I am new here so not sure if this is a good answer or not. Ha ha. You have a nice day by the way!