Are there actually people who can tell if someone´s gay or bi by just looking at them? The other day I met this friend, we were talking about girls, and then he started telling me about his techniques, and he said he went to gay clubs to find girls cause theres no competition and all that stuff, he told me I should go with him one day. Then he started saying he has this ability to tell who is gay, and bi just by looking at them and he never misses. So it got me wondering if perhaps he found out about me and didnt tell me, or he really doesnt have this ability. What do you think?
I don't think anyone can honestly claim to be perfect at it, but with experience and some time observing someone you can usually get some sort of rough idea. In 99.5% of cases you won't be able to tell from just a glance unless they've got a great big rainbow t-shirt saying "I'M GAY" (and even then, it could be a joke). And of course there are 'gay-acting' straight people and 'straight-acting' gay people where it simply won't work. Additionally culture does gradually change so things that used to be associated with being gay no longer are (e.g. plenty of straight guys now use moisturiser whereas they wouldn't 10 or even 5 years ago). There are certainly some cues and mannerisms that people have that can be used to determine their orientation, but it's not an exact science and you can't be 100% sure unless they actually tell you they're gay or bi.
i agree with Ridiculous there is no way of knowing a person is gay from just looking at them not now a days in less your really obvious and even then you could be wrong but are you sure hes stright lol who goes to gay clubs to pick up straight chicks???
he said it was a good technique cause there ar some straight girls and all guys are gay, so youre the only one they can actually do something with. And then he also said its awesome cause you feel like the center of attention because both guys and the straight girls that are there like you and look at you and stuff. Oh and he also mentioned he wears an earing on the left ear so everyone know he is straight
Well that earring thing went out of fashion ages ago, so I don't think he really knows his gay stereotypes . Also typically if a girl wants to go to a gay bar, they are probably there so they won't get hit on. And how would they know he was straight and to pay attention to him anyway? I personally think your friend is a little full of himself.
yea maybe he is, although he also mentioned he went to gay clubs because he had alot of gay friends in the first place, so then he learned to get girls in those clubs
most of the time people can just tell by the way someone acts like me for instance sometimes i make it obvious lol but oh well.
I personally think that any person who admits to having gaydar is simply someone who judges and reinforces sexual orientation stereotypes. And that your friend is exploiting this to fulfil his ego. Him not being able to identify you as gay/bi simply answers your question with two answers: gaydar doesn't exist, and (ipso facto), missed and doesn't have the ability.
My cousin's ex actually met her at a gay club. He said it's the best way to pick up secure girls. He's her ex so...heh... I doubt there's anyone with a sure fire method to tell someone's sexual orientation. I think, assuming that one has a gaydar, in general, isn't really something to be proud of. It just mean that you have discriminatory tendencies. I'm observant, but I don't judge. I will observe to see what makes people tick. But, I can't tell what makes people tick until I see it. I will only assume someone is gay when I see him/her sentimentally kiss another dude/dudette or flat-out say they are, with a the word proud somewhere along the way. An erect pinky while holding tea cup doesn't do it for me. I met the girliest guy I've seen a year ago... the dude was was so girly everyone called him bi-name. He didn't mind it at all, so some of us actually though he was bi for real. Turns out, he was just metro and the fact that he didn't really care about anything made him super charming to all the girls. Hahahaha he turned out to be the biggest man-whore I've ever met. I'm kinda glad I didn't assume anything...would've fallen into another unrequited rut, if I did.
See, I'm of the opinion that even though a lot of people think their "gaydar is good" because they do a lot of stereotyping, there's also a lot to be said about being able to tell someone's sexual orientation from following their eyes or body language when they're around the same or the opposite sex. It's not always accurate and it's not always obvious right away, but being able to tell someone's sexual orientation from nonverbal cues is the same as being able to tell anything about anyone from nonverbal cues. You can get a pretty good idea if you know how to read people, but also you can be dead wrong sometimes. So I guess it depends on how you're judging. If you're looking at the way people act around each other, you're much more likely to be able to tell who someone is into and that tends to be more accurate than blind stereotyping.
honestly i have no idea. but i do know that some people are more intuitive in that area than others...of course there is no way of being 100% sure about it, because human beings are all so different, but i think that people can take educated guesses. for example, a little while ago i was talking to my friend (Megan) about how i have a crush on this girl...and another friend of mine (Yvette, who didn't know at the time of my orientation) walked up and said "whatcha talking about?" and i replied "nothing." and she said "can i guess?" and i said "sure, but you won't get it." and right out of the blue, Yvette, who i had thought just didn't really have a clue about anything ever, asked me "are you a lesbian?" and then later, "who's the girl?" lol.
My sister claimed to be able to tell when a person was gay or bi. Always found that funny because she could never tell that I'm bi. Everybody was surprised. But, I'm also one that makes sexual crude humor about girls lol. Sound like a Ryan Reynolds comedy sometimes.
I had an acute crush on the cafe guy at tafe for a couple of days; and I was getting a vibe from him that he was gay or bi, and maneuvered the conversation into a subtle sounding out. Turns out he was quite straight :dry: :lol: If there is gaydar, it's fraught with gremlins :dry:
Gaydar is most definitely real. I know a lot of people who are uncomfortable with that notion, particularly if they are closeted, but there are people who seem to have a very accurate 6th sense about it. One of them is a (straight) friend of mine who is known, jokingly, by those around him as a Gaydar jedi. He hasn't been wrong yet, and in some cases, identified people 5 or 6 years before they came out. Now I do think there are people that for one reason or another are completely "insulated" from gaydar, meaning no one can tell they're gay. But those people are, in my experience, few and far between. And from my non-scientific, wild-assed guesstimate, about 80% of the people who insist they're absolutely invisible and no one can tell... anyone with decent gaydar knows they're gay in spite of their beliefs to the contrary. People are a lot more obvious, even when completely closeted, then they realize.
I like to think my gaydar is pretty spot on. It's never just looking at someone though. It's about seeing, examining, listening, observing. You need to take in the whole person.
