I'm 41, married, into guys, and wondering why it's so hard to make friends with them. In any kind of setting it seems like guys are resistant to making eye contact or offering any form of acknowledgement, even though I make efforts in that direction whenever I'm out in public or some other social situation. Oftentimes it's like they don't even notice at all. Whether they make what appears to be a deliberate effort to ignore you, or act like you're not even important enough to be on their radar in the first place, either way it makes no sense to me. Sometimes I'd like to strike up a conversation, but I'm afraid that most of them are going to take it as some sort of unwelcome sexual advance, which isn't my intention at all. There's a lot more to be said, but I'm going to leave it at that for now. I would appreciate any feedback, especially from any of the guys on here who know what I'm talking about, or who act in the way I described. It would be great to get some insight into this. Thanks for your help.
its just the way we are, I think its because we are into guys that some of us want to make sure it doesn't look like we are hitting or flirting with each other and bu avoiding eye contact we can ensure that it looks like it does. that my best guess.
Yeah I would agree with that. In my experience I look away because I don't wanna come off as some creepy guy. That's mostly because I assume most of the guys i look at are straight and I don't want them thinking I'm some creepy gay guy checking them out... but anyway I hope that helped a little.
Personally, I haven't run into this. I'm 41, I'm gay, I'm out, everybody knows, and I haven't had any real trouble making friends with guys - gay or straight. I haven't had anybody seem weirded out by it. I just find some common ground (which usually isn't that difficult), chat about that some, and if I sense some sort of connection, I try to find some way to continue the conversation. I'll ask if I can add them on Facebook, usually - I feel weird asking for a phone number until I know somebody better. Do you have trouble finding that common ground? Lex
