well i told one of my best friends that i'am gay the thing is he says nothing between me and him is gonna change but over the past few weeks hes been kinda avoiding me like he'll hang out with me and stuff but not like we used to and i already told him i never liked him before but other than that what am i supposed to do?
I guess, despite what he said, he's finding the whole situation awkward. He doesn't know what to say or do, so he's taking the easy way out. By still seeing you he's trying to show that he's OK with it, but he obviously isn't, at least not yet. It can take people some time to come to terms with this. You have changed his understanding of you, and he needs to get used to that. The best thing you can do is carry on as though nothing has changed. Which it hasn't really - you are still the same person, he just knows a bit more about you now. Hopefully given some more time he will be OK with it. He'll either get used to the idea and things will return to how they were, or he'll drift away from you. There's not a lot you can do about it really, as long as you aren't putting pressure on him bu wanting to discuss it when he doesn't (that would scare him off). If ultimately you lose him over this, then he wasn't such a close friend after all. If it looks like this will happen, try to spend more time with other friends. Being upset of you lose him won't do you any good, so let him go if that's what he wants.
Just a little add on point to Paul's post...i may be a smart idea to try and do the exact same things as you used to....make him realise that you havent changed because of this...you still have the same interests, sense of humor etc. Just show him the only thing thats changed is that you like guys...besides that you're the same person. Get what im trying to say? Anyway as Paul said if he drifts away then so be it....there's nothing you couldve or can do....it had to happen eventually, i mean you're gay, it was either tell him now or later on in life. Just try not to think about it too much, carry on as per usual....blessed be!
Paul and proud have such excellent advice. Sometimes, despite what friends say, they have to digest it and they think about it, etc. Sometimes, I think, they really don't believe that we don't have the hots for them. In some cases, it takes repeating that message so they truly believe it. (Although, I have a few friends then say, "What's wrong with ME? I'm not good enough for you?" Half kidding of course, but I guess I drove home the point a bit too well.) Good luck with this. Know that you did the right thing, and if he can't handle it, it's his loss more than yours. You want friends who are with the real you, not some fake you. That's what matters. Let us know what happens.
ive been having a similar problem with my friend but one thing you have to remember is that its either live a lie and have some false friends or to just be happy and keep your real friends. if your friend drifts away, find new friends that wont. thats about all you can do. good luck with it anyways. i
dude everything will be all right , if he cannot live with that aspect of you then he isnt as good a friend as u think . coz friends stick with u no matter what n besides this is only u showing that ur sense of love is a bit different , its not like u confessed a murder or something . listen to Paul n proud's advice n chill
