During the past week I've grown pretty close to my art instructor (who's openly gay) and to my brother (who again is openly gay, yes I know 2 people who are open about it, in fact those are the only two people I know who aren't straight) but over the past week, I've been talking to them a little bit more. I've been able to confide in my older brother, and I'm slowly confiding in my art instructor (Oh i forgot to mention, he's my private instructor who's worked with my dad for years. My dad just doesn't know he's gay or the fact I'm..okay now we get the point of this thread.) Since I've been confiding in them more and more I've actually had a few moments to actually think. I've really been discovering more and more about myself, but I can't come to accept the word lesbian. At all. There's just something that bugs me behind the word, and I honestly have no idea what to do about it. My brother can't think of anything, and my art instructor doesn't even know yet.
It's not wrong to not like the word lesbian. I actually am not a huge fan of it either, though it has grown on me a little bit. When I'm discussing my sexual orientation, I generally use the word gay. It's not just for guys! Stick around here, and you'll see, lots of gay women use "gay" and not "lesbian". Simple as that
I think it's quite common for non-straight people of both genders not to feel comfortable with the words that are commonly used to describe their sexual orientations. I know I wasn't for a long time. Those words have a lot of meaning associated to them, and it's not always positive. It may be even harder to associate such an uncomfortable word with ourselves. My advice is to go slowly. Try to get used to it, if you can. Relating it to positive ideas (such as lesbian people you admire, for example) may also help.
Well, take a look at this: Famous Lesbians Lesbian Icons - Famous Lesbians - Velvet-Club for Lesbians +Bi Women Famous Lesbians and Bisexual Women I guess it is a good starting point. =D
If you don't like the word lesbian then don't accept it! I identify myself as a lesbian, but only because it easier to try & explain that I'm gay & transgendered by saying I'm a lesbian in a biologically male body than try & explain over & over that yes, I am gay, but no, not for guys. Personally, I'd rather just say I'm a gay woman, but it was easier when I came out to my 3 friends to put it that way. As far as I'm concerned, they're all just labels that society uses to make it easier to identify groups of people anyway. Screw the mainstream & just go with whatever you're comfy with!
There is a girl in my queer studies that said she identifies only as "gay" because she cannot stand the word lesbian. Thus, you are not alone.
