And it sucks. Since everyone is attending college everywhere, all 4 of my actual, close friends are moving away. No, I'm not kidding when I say 4: I talk to a bunch of people, but there are 4 I actually consider close friends. A couple have moved out of state, others a couple of hours away. With that, I pretty much have nobody that I can really talk to or hang out with. But of course, with me starting college, that means there are thousands of people to make friends with. So what's the problem? I suck at making friends. A lot. And with me being a full time commuter student, and a full time employee, I don't really see the point in making friends with these people. I know there are clubs and shit I can join, but a lot of events are evening events that conflict with my work hours. Or maybe I'm just afraid to move out of my comfort zone and actually do something for once. Advice? Stop being a bitch and move out of my comfort zone? Advice appreciated.
Keep open contact with your friends, e-mail, Facebook, hell even post cards. I've lost a lot of friends over the years and my biggest regret is not keeping in contact. I know what you are going through, and I know how hard it can feel to make friends., but you have to realize how easy it really is. I've made friends literally with only a handshake and a friendly face. Do you know how much a compliment or a smile means to somebody who's had a bad day? So you are starting College. You'll be a freshman surrounded by a bunch of other freshman and I have no doubt that they will feel just like you do. They will want to desperately make friends but not have the courage to open up. If you go in smiling and strike up a conversation with anyone and everyone I have no doubt that you will make a few friends. Hiding behind the walls you've built up only repels people, if you don't feel comfortable around yourself then chances are they won't feel comfortable around you either. I know because I used to have no friends, most of my school career was spent in self pity alone in the corner. I was that kid nobody talked to and that everyone made fun of. Then I got a lucky break, I was enrolled in a vocational high school and had a second chance at a first impression. The first day I made 5 friends by just smiling and greeting everyone in my class. That's it, just a smile and a hello and I had friends again. It's hard to believe but it really is that easy.
Keep in touch with your close friends as much as possible. Texting and calling are great ways to do so. And I'm sure they will come back and visit for holidays and such, especially if they have family living there. College is a great time to meet new people. Yes, you'll have a busy schedule commuting to and from school and working full time, but since you said you wouldn't have anyone else to hang out with, maybe spend some more time on campus. Join some clubs, talk to people in your classes, socialize in the student cafeteria, etc. As you said, there are thousands of students at that college so making friends shouldn't be too hard. Break out of your shell a little and meet new people. Have fun and good luck.
You can still consider them your close friends. They are just studying somewhere else, the friendships with go on. But I do know what you are going through, I've lost most of my friends, I only have two, yep, two friends that I consider close, and I still can't tell them everything about me. It sounds like your not giving these possible friends a chance, so just go for it, remember that when you join a new school/college, you can be who ever you want to be. Maybe what made it hard for you to make friends last time, try and justify what that is and change it before you start. You're be fine, we all dont like change. And you will always know who your true friends are in the end, just don't let them go... =D A.S
I went through a similar situation too. When I finished high school, I had 4 close,good friends, and we all went to study in different places. Thanks to technology (skype, facebook, twitter, etc), we are still in touch and we still hang-out whenever we are all in our home town. It may sound cheesy, but real friends last forever. IMO, it’s easier to make friends in college than I high school. You will find a great variety of people with different backgrounds and interests. I’m not a very outgoing person, but I was still able to make good friends in college, and now that I moved out of state I really miss them. I really recommend you joining a club(s) of some sort. They help you meet new people and they helped me becoming more outgoing.
I'm going to agree with everyone else and tell you to go for it and make as many friends as you want You definitely do not suck it. You already made 4 close friends which is not very common for many people. Making friends and getting yourself out there is tricky, but its actually a skill which means you can work it and actually learn how to make friends. I know, sounds silly, but its so true. Learning how to make friends with people and socialize is a skill that you are going to need for the rest of your life. Might as well start working on it now
I'm not an outgoing person and luckily my freshman roommate was more social so I met friends somewhat through him, but some on my own in the dorm. You might meet friends at work too. They'll have similar interests as you. I'm sure you can keep in touch with your old friends too. I actually got closer to one hs friend after I went away to college. I ended up being his best man when he got married. My biggest regret from college is not knowing I was gay which wasn't really my fault, but at least you have that part figured out. I just wish I had the chance to meet gay guys back then and have some of that experience. You are lucky enough to have that chance still so I really hope you don't let your college years pass you by in that regard. Oh, just noticed you're from WI, so was I. Go Packers :smilewave
