First off, I'm sorry if this offends anyone. These are my opinions and feelings - nothing more. So I am (or was) Roman Catholic. I used to be involved in the parish community and was part of the choir within the english ministry. I made some cool friends (both young and old) and thoroughly enjoyed our practices and events both inside and outside the walls of the church. I was always more of a 'my own faith' kind of a guy. Not catholic by definition because I don't really believe in the bible or any other man-created traditions (regardless of how infallible I'm told their creators were). So I'd go through the movements of mass with the congregation every Sunday, but really I was there for the music. However, recently it has gotten too much and I can no longer stand the preaching. and the ominous reciting. The local catholic school board is trying to push for a vote against the teaching of homosexuality as an 'option' and the emphasizing of it as a sin. We've had guest speakers coming in trying to work up the community and pull votes in the church's favour. Compounded with the hateful speech directed at the lgbt community at WYD in August, I am repulsed by the community in which I grew up and no longer want to have any part in it whatsoever. And that leaves my choir. I can't possibly keep singing of praise and sitting through mass without feeling like I've betrayed who I am and what I stand for. But I'll miss it. I haven't been to choir in almost two months (under the guise of my vacation out of the country) because I've been avoiding making a decision. And even then, I don't really know how to 'resign'. I do not feel comfortable explaining the reasoning behind my leaving, but I also feel guilty about giving them anything less the truth. I don't really know why I'm posting this thread. Having formulated these thoughts into words, it's pretty clear what my decision should (and will) be. Any comments?
Have you looked into other choirs? Many cities of some size usually have gay singing groups, but you don't even have to go that route. Community choirs and what not might be an option. As far as resigning, you don't really need to give a reason. You can simply say "I've decided not to continue singing with the choir." Lex
I went through 13 years of Catholic school dude. That probably played a part in why I started coming out (even to myself) so late. I don't think it was really a bad experience. I took religion classes that preached "being gay isn't a sin, but doing gay things is a sin." I just wish I could go back and have the courage to argue, but it wouldn't have done any good. At the end of the day my parents were paying the private school for me to get that jerk's opinion. I'm being a little overly cruel I guess. The World Religions class I took my senior year is one of the best classes I've ever taken. However, I totally agree with your philosophy. The church (just like politics) wants to go about the business of having you share their opinion on EVERY issue. I mean, do you really think you're gonna go to hell for using condoms, because they are unnatural? Its like suddenly when you use rubber for sex rubber because some entirely different... I'm getting off topic. My point is this. I believe in "something greater then ourselves" what that may be, I'm not sure. If I was supposed to know right now then I would. So for now, I'm gonna care a little less about what religion is "right" and care a little bit more about helping my fellow man. As for your plight, if you truly feel uncomfortable standing and praising for something you don't believe in, I think you know what you need to do. There are other choirs, gay choirs, etc. You should use your talents for what YOU believe in.
I went through years of catholic school and in my freshman year had them preach how being gay was a sin at us. Sophomore year is when they really got into it and I begged my dad to let me transfer school because a few kids found out I had a girl friend and I was bullied. I told the administration but they did nothing. My point being is maybe give the excuse, "I just don't want to sing here anymore" and if you want stay in contact with some of them. Just because you are leaving doesn't mean that you can't still keep your friends
You'd be surprised at how many "gay friendly" churches there are. Check and see if there's one in your area- you can always sing somewhere else!
Thanks for the reponses I'm also in my college choir, so my concern isn't over losing my connect to being in a choir. I guess it's just that quitting will be cutting the final ties left to the religion and community that I've grown up in. Not that I am looking for another religion or that I feel like I need to tweak my beliefs. The closing of a chapter. Seems like a big step. And I'm at that point where I'm afraid they may convince me to stay because I myself am not fully convinced that this decision is in my best interest
First I'd like to say, thats a disgrace, I've been brought up as a Catholic my entire life, so I completely understand where you are coming from. Do I believe in God? Yeah, Do I believe I'm going to burn in hell? No. I have my own viewing of God, and all that hate and prejudice towards LGBT people in the Church is disgraceful. Being the reason for my own viewing. Lex's advice seems pretty good, maybe you should consider joining a Church that is more accepting, or a Choir like Lex said. It seems like you've already made up your mind, and too right, you are entirely right my friend. Shoving that kind of discrimination down someones throat is disgusting and you should avoid it altogether. It can't of helped so if I was you, I would not give them the satisfaction, sometimes the biggest statement, is just walking away. It sounds like they are narrow minded and not worth the time of day, but thats the majority of the Catholic Church for you. Good Luck
