ok so it all started when i asked my dad about his opinion on gays. i wish i didnt.. he said he wished every gay person would just rot in hell and that the world would be better off if gays never existed. he also told me that just the thought of gays made him feel disguised and also said gays are abominations.. i sat there and felt my heart stop...and wat makes me even more mad is that he told me how i always pay attention to other peoples mistakes and learn from them.. the thing is.. I dont see anything wrong with gays!!!!!!!!!! i always took up for gays even before i knew i was gay! I dont even know wat to believe in anymore. he keeps on saying gays are not normal. im thinking wdf! there is no such thing as "normal!!!" I know my dad has been an :***: most of my life but this just threw my over the edge... any advice would help me out at this point. he said a lot more inappropriate things about gays that im not going to type cuz they are just that bad. and no he doesnt know im gay yet so the day i tell him is going to be ..fun..:bang: (sorry for spelling and/or grammar errors)
My simple advice would be to try your best to ignore him and don't tell him you're gay until you're older, away from home and able to support yourself without him.
Sounds like a pretty open minded guy, so anyone who isn't like him shold rot in hell? interesting...if not pig headed
Welcome to the club! My mother is just like your dad. I'm not planning to tell my parents until my financial situation changes. You have to be brave and stay focused. There's nothing wrong with you, your dad simply has a different perspective. You just have to respect him and his opinions as much as he must respect you. You didn't mention your mum; what about her? I'm sorry you have to go through this as well and at such a young age. I wish you the best luck and hope! Remember that what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger. This always helps me feel better. If you need anything else, just send me a message and I'll try my best to help. (*hug*)
LoneWolf...I am sorry your Dad reacted this way. I have encountered alot of people who really acted exactly the way your Dad reacts until they learned that someone they love is gay. So don't write your Dad off just yet.
First off, please don't think that just because you dad said these things there is anything wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with you. You are not unnatural or an abomination, and you should not rot in hell because you are gay. You are an amazing person, worthy of respect and love, and being gay doesn't change any of that. I know how hard it is to hear things like that and still think of yourself as a worthy person and what a set back that can be when it comes to accepting yourself, so that is really important to remember. Next, what I would suggest doing is unfortunately waiting to be out until after you are relatively stable on your own just in case. I'm not saying that your dad would kick you out, because some people make incredible transformations once someone that they actually know and love announces that they are gay and they can see that it doesn't change the person at all, but it is better for you to make sure that you are safe and are in a place where you could take care of yourself just in case. Hopefully, though, when the time comes, he will be one of those people who may take some time to adjust to the idea but can accept you for who you are.
many parents are like this, including mine, it does not mean they are bad people (although i know little of your dad), although your dad's views seem extreme. i'd say telling him while you still live there would be a HUGE mistake. although it may be possible he turns his views but it may be months if not years even if that does happen. so telling him when you dont live there is probably your best bet. im sorry your in that position btw, just hang in there and come here when you need it
My Dad is like an mirror image of yours. I feel for you because I am like you quite a lot of the time. Just try best to not raise the topic. Like Becky said, many parents do change there views once somebody close to them comes out.
Keep your head up! Be proud of who you are! You may not have your dad, yet, but you have us here at EC! I know it makes home life uncomfortable but stick it out until you are out of the house for good just in case. And keep us posted!!! We are here for you!
I did something similar with my mom. Her response was, "I would kill myself if one of my son was gay!" I don't know why but I still love her...but even without that comment, my mom's not really anyone's favorite person. She's pretty hard to be around. My dad is pretty open minded and I actually think that if he grew up in a more developed society he could actually be ok with my sexuality. Too bad he didn't... I tested him once. His response was, "I can't imagine ever being with a man. I don't how these men can." That's on a good day though... he has a bit of a temper. I'm sure that if I were to come out, someone might die. If not me, then definitely one of them. I'm working hard towards my independence now... I'll find it someday!!!
