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My best friend is moving away.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by WydenEmmie, Sep 17, 2011.

  1. WydenEmmie

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    I don't know if this really belong here, but...

    I've known my best friend since preschool. He has a complicated home life, and has to switch between his father and his grandfather' house just to go to school that I used to attend. I still go in for band, so I still constantly see him. He sits right next to me, playing tenor saxophone (I play saxophone), and always makes me laugh, even if I'm really sad. I never hung out with him outside of school because he lives in a different town when he's with his dad, like over the weekends. So, I ONLY see him during band. But he's been there with me, for me, forever. On the bus ride home from our away (football) game, he told me and three of our other friends that he would most likely, slim-to-no chance that he wouldn't be, moving about two hours away (sometime next year). I looked at him, and asked if he was serious. He said he was. I couldn't believe it. As we were unloading the instruments off of the band truck, I asked him again, still not believing it. I asked him a third time before I started walking around the corner of the school building to get to the front. I stopped against the wall and started crying a little. I stood there for about two minutes and then stopped and walked the rest of the way to the front to call my mother.

    I sat on the low wall, watching the other band memebers pass me. Some said bye, to which I responded with a small wave, others just walked past. I was the last one there other than my other friend. He noticed my sitting there, on the verge of tears again, and asked what was wrong. I told him about our friend leaving. He didn't have time to ask about anything else, because his brother had called their mom, and they ended up needing to get a ride home with someone who was already there. I was there for about two minutes after they left.

    When I got home, I went straight up to my room and cried for almost an hour. I haven't cried since I was six, and when I was six, it was over a horrible headache. I texted my friend that had asked if I was okay and he texted me until I fell asleep, after telling me not to do anything stupid. I said I wouldn't, then fell asleep. Now I'm typing this for any means of help or suggestions as to how to keep our friendship. It may only be two hours away, but that's two hours I don't have time for to just drive, nor does my mother have the gas to drive me there (stupid gas prices). Anybody know what I can do to make this not as bad as it is? Please? :icon_sad:
     
  2. Kerze

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    This is going to sound like the worst thing anybody can say to you right now but you're 13 and you'll get over it. My best friend moved away when I was like 11/12 and I missed him because we'd known each other since we were 5, but I don't even think of him anymore. I don't even have him as a friend on facebook. The people I'm closest to now I only casually knew when I was 13 and the people I was best friends with 4+ years ago are absolute tools who I barely speak to.

    Plus moving away doesn't have mean you stop talking. Just stay in touch on facebook.
     
  3. WydenEmmie

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    I have every intention on trying to stay in touch over Facebook and phone. But he's rarely on and always looses his phone. And true, I guess.
     
  4. Mercy

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    Every one copes their own way and i know how u feel im sorry about ur friend and the sadness you have <3
     
  5. WydenEmmie

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  6. Fugs

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    That sucks =/, I know it's hard but tell him how you feel about him moving away. Make sure to get his phone number and his email address.

    A friend I had a huge crush on moved away recently and the thing I regret most is not telling him how I felt and not asking for his number.
     
  7. Gallatin

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    Facebook, email, phone, Skype are all good ways to stay in touch.

    But like others have said, and I know it sounds not so good, but you're only 13, and there will be other close friendships that you'll develop. I had a best friend in middle school, we were really close. We ended up going to different high schools, and stayed in touch for a little while, but eventually lost contact until he found me on Facebook a few years ago. So, yeah, I thought it was going to be the end of the world not going to the same high school as him, but it really wasn't. I met a guy on my first day of classes in high school, we instantly clicked, and we are still best friends today, even though we go to colleges that are hours apart.
     
  8. Hazel

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    Just stay in touch. You might tough it out together, and you might just have to let go knowing that you still care about each other.

    When I was 11, my best friend moved away and now we haven't heard from each other in almost a decade. On the other hand, my best friend from middle school has moved to the big city and even to England for a time, but we've always managed to keep our friendship intact despite it going through periods when we were very distracted from each other. Sometimes we only had Facebook and Skype, but our paths always crossed again eventually even when we had to make a point of it.

    The fact that it's only two hours away is in your favor, even if it seems out of the question to visit right now. Money for the drive can be saved up, and time to visit can be arranged when things aren't so busy. There might still be opportunities to see each other in person, even if rare.

    In the meantime, make a point of getting to know some other people close by. They can't replace him, but they can help you to feel less alone with him gone.
     
  9. WydenEmmie

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    He doesn't use his email, and neither of us have Skype, but I do have his Facebook and phone number. And I guess I wouldn't be so upset if I figured I'd make new friends, but I have always had trouble making friends. I have about four really good friends, and two good friends, but they are all older than me. I don't get along with kids my age that well. So, that's one of the reasons I'm really sad about him leaving. Thanks for the support. :slight_smile:

    @Fugs, it stinks that you never got to tell him and get his number.

    @alex2020, That's good that it worked out for you.

    @Hazel, it sucks that two of your best friends moved. And yeah, two hours is better than four or more. I really hope we can stay connected and visit often.
     
    #9 WydenEmmie, Sep 17, 2011
    Last edited: Sep 17, 2011