So I've been trying to figure out myself a bit more and am making progress, but am still a bit confused on the difference between crossdresser and genderqueer. I always wear boys' clothes, I think I would prefer a male name/pronouns but still not positive, and I want to bind. I've heard from some people that crossdressers do these things, and I've heard from some people that it means I'm genderqueer. I also have no interest in hormones or surgery of any kind whatsoever. So, here are my questions. First, what is the difference between a genderqueer and a crossdresser. Second, do crossdressers sometimes bind or use male pronouns? Lastly, what does it sound like I am? Thanks for all the help! :icon_bigg
I can't tell you what you are, only you can do that. But I can tell you that finding out where drag kings hang out and dragging with them is the way to go. My group of friends are all drag kings and a lot of them do it just for fun or as a way of expressing themselves (gender queer style) but some of them are trans. I hang out with a lot of drag kings, and do it myself, so I can say that we usually don't use the term 'crossdresser'. Maybe just cause that implies an mtf situation.
Keeping in mind that everyone has the right to self-identify and no single definition of these words is ever going to satisfy everyone, the difference between "crossdresser" and "genderqueer" is that crossdressing has to do with gender expression, while genderqueer is more about gender identity. Although there is crossover between the two and other such exceptions, for the most part, crossdressers identify as and are comfortable with the gender they were born into, but dress up as the opposite gender occasionally (or often!) as part of their gender expression. Most of the time it is not a 24/7 thing. Genderqueer people tend to identify as something other than the gender they were assigned at birth. Genderqueer is often an identity taken when someone does not feel comfortable as either male or female, but rather somewhere in between or outside of the binary entirely. Even though some people may see genderqueers as "crossdressing" (for example, if a stranger reads them as being born female, but they are wearing men's clothing), they are more likely to see themselves as expressing and dressing appropriately for their true gender identity. A crossdresser may or may not use the pronouns of the gender they are dressing as, but would most likely only use them while crossdressing. Same with the binder - when dressing as a guy, a crossdresser would likely want to bind, but would not when dressing as a girl. A genderqueer person is likely to use whatever pronoun they feel most comfortable with and use it all the time. And they are also more likely to feel dysphoria around their breasts (if they have them) and bind for that reason. But remember, genderqueer people can (and do) crossdress as well! In response to your last question, I cannot tell you what or who you are. But ask yourself the question (and I am assuming here that you were born female...excuse me if I am wrong), do you find yourself simply wanting to express or present more male at times or do you feel that you actually ARE more male/not female?
For A while I used to go to Wal mart and buy women's clothing and come home and play dress up...It was more of a sexual thing...I think...deep down I wanted to be pretty but have sense retained my sense of being a masculine male or just accepted it. I've always wanted to crossdress and it wasn't till I got to a certain age that I had the freedom to do so as an adult and experiment...the phase is long gone And I don't have the desire anymore really...But when you grow up in school and its all about being a guy and masculine and your kind of denied that freedom... I remember in school a girl left her jeans at my best friends house and we played with them I was amazed when he taught me how girl jeans have the stretchy fabric in the ass...He put them on he still looked like a toothpick but I got a little more and was wondering what they would look like on me but didn't feel comfortable trying on someone else's clothing for a variety of reasons...I just always thought there was a secret why girls looked pretty and I looked like a hairy white male...Come to realize thats just how it works lol...and now I'm confused weather I'm attracted to men or not lol. My honest advice would be to wear what you want and wear what you like. Nobody should ever get upset when either sex dresses masculine its when males don't pass in female clothes that people get up in arms. And that whole thing about wanting to be pretty I don't know what started that really when I was young I thought about it and was so happy to be a boy...idk
Genderfork ^ This is a blogroll about gender variance. Reading some other perspectives might help you self identify.
