This past week(ish) has been... an education experience. I guess that's a good way to put it. First of all, my sister came out to me as bi (Everyone else knew and she's cool with it). I'm not exactly sure how that makes me feel. On the one hand, I'm glad she is happy, but on the other, it makes me feel like I'm making a mountain out of a molehill. Then my other sister wrinkled her nose at everything gay, (Does that make sense?) and my mother can't say the word lesbian. On the plus side, my class legalized gay marriage. There is hope for future. Also, is it possible that they know or something? It seems like LGBT subjects are popping up everywhere! Not to mention the many mixed signals I'm getting. So yeah, help? Or maybe even some similar stories of your own? Thanks in advance.
I don't think you should feel like you are making "a mountain out of a mole hill." First of all everyone is different, and you made have different emotional needs than your sister in terms of being accepted, which is perfectly fine. I have a totally supportive family and group of friends and I am still not out. Its really about me, not them. While coming out as bi definitely requires courage, I still think it is different than coming out as gay. If your family is not perfectly accepting, bisexuality for them at least means that it is still possible for your sister to be "normal." Whereas being lesbian rules out that possibility. Perhaps you sense this difference. A second thing I wonder about is how you think your family will feel about having two girls who are not straight. For a small amount of time I thought my brother, my only other sibling, was gay, and I kind of wanted to come out first so that I wasn't the son who ended their hopes of having full biological grandchildren. Just some food for thought. Let me know if there are any other questions you have.
Thanks. I guess that she is more "normal". As she puts it girls are hot, but she doesn't want a relationship with them. My family is very accepting, despite a few minor issues. They've even asked me if I was gay, and said that they would love me no matter what. I just feel like I'm lying to them if I don't tell them, but I honestly don't think I can tell them or anyone else for that matter. I'm not even sure where that leaves me. Thanks again for the advice.
If your family has come out and asked you, and told you that they would love you regardless, then it could be that they already know and they're waiting for you to tell them. So it might be time. At the same time, if your mother still scoffs at anything 'lesbian' then perhaps you need to point out there that this is in conflict with her statement about loving you regardless of your orientation - because you certainly 'wouldn't' feel loved based on these other comments she makes. She might just need that reminder.
