ok so next year i am going to be going to university i will be living on campus witch means moving out of home. is it wimpy of me too wait till i move out next February before i come out to my mum telling her that i am not straight and that i have a girlfriend. it means that i don't have to directly deal with her reaction and i don't have to face her everyday once she knows... me and my mum are not close at all i have no clue what her reaction will be... do you think i should do it before then or wait till i move out?
No, it's not wimpy. I waited before I told my mom until the day before I left for school. I would just try to have a little time so that if she had any questions she could ask you them to your face. It just really depends on when you feel like your ready.
It's wimpy, but that's not the worst of it. More importantly, it's not healthy for your relationship with her. How would you feel if right before you left for college she told you she'd started seeing someone new, or was going to sell the house and move out of state, or that she'd been diagnosed with cancer? Telling someone an important thing right before leaving them is unfair to them, it doesn't give them time to process and ask questions, and it tells them you don't really trust them. In short, it's not conducive to maintaining a healthy relationship. If you're worried that she'll have a seriously negative reaction, it might be best not to tell her. Strong initial reactions can blow over, but telling her right before leaving is likely to intensify the negative reaction because it indicates a lack of trust and respect.
1st off i hadn't plan on telling her to her face i was going to write her a letter i don't have much of a relationship with her i find it very hard to tell her things we are not close and we don't have much of a relationship at all. I've never been close to her. 2nd i don't want her to ask questions I'm not good at handling questions face to face i panic. and i don't have to worry about trying to maintain a healthy relationship as we don't have one my relationship with my mum consist of living in the same house and using the same car and talking minimal amount.
I don't think it's necessarily wimpy, no. Everyone comes out at different stages of their life and if you think being away from home would be easier to do that then that is your choice and you should do what you feel most comfortable doing. Your mom might take it well or not, you would probably know better than we would what her reaction might be. Waiting until you go away to university is choice that many people make since the start of university is a new stepping stone in life.
