1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

She wants to come out: I want to help her.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Jewel, Oct 3, 2011.

  1. Jewel

    Jewel Guest

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2011
    Messages:
    26
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    The Netherlands
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    My girlfriend and I have been (secretly) together for five months now. My parents and brothers know, but they're the only ones. Her family thinks we're just best friends.
    She recently told me she wants to come out to her mother, and of course I was really happy. But whenever the subject comes up, she seems terrified of the idea. She keeps telling me that she wants this, and she denied agreeing to do it because I want her to. I just really want to be there for her when she decides to come out, and I really want to help her, but my coming out was so easy that I don't really have tips for coming out to your half-religious mother. So I really need some tips I can give her.
    She also wants me to be there when she tells her mother, but I'm not sure that's such a good idea.
    So, basically, how can I help her in her coming out?
     
  2. BradThePug

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2011
    Messages:
    6,573
    Likes Received:
    288
    Location:
    Ohio
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Well, I would say that she should research about LGBT issues and how the bible does not say that it is forbidden. I would also say to be prepared for any reaction. Also, maybe if your not comfortable with being there when she come out, you could be close by so if she needed someplace to go afterwards.

    Good Luck!!
     
  3. RaeofLite

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2009
    Messages:
    1,344
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    BC, Canada
    If you can get a good book on coming out, or something for parents/family of lesbians and gays about the issue of sexuality, it might help. I did that with my parents. It's been over two years and they've started to come around. It might take time for them and she has to try to anticipate the worst, but hope for the best responses. If the parents want support, research gay friendly groups like PFLAG in your area if they are open to attending those.
     
  4. wellhidden

    wellhidden Guest

    Ok things can get a bit nasty if you stay whilst her coming out because it is very easy for the half religous parents to blame you that you converted her to being a lesbian. So you have to decide what your going to do if that situation arises and your relationship with her might be obstructed due to her parents intervening.
    I send my luck for her.