I'm sure this is a pretty commonly asked question but..... im like afraid of what my father might do or say when i tell him about myself.... my father is racist and sexist so it wouldnt suprise me if he kicked me out of the house.... and I have no where else to go as of right now.... Can someone give me some advice on how i should go about explaining this to him? I'm not very good at talking to him as it is....
Hi Siesta. Welcome to the site =) It might help to have a little more information, like how old you are, if you are financially dependent on him or your mother or both. Most of the time people may initially act badly but usually they come around within a couple years. Only you can decide if you are ready to tell someone now or if you'd be better to wait. ---------- Post added 5th Oct 2011 at 11:17 PM ---------- Also your picture is cute =)
Well, I am 19 years old. Going to college 3 days a week and I work with my father the rest of the time. So yes I am dependant on him financialy right now. The only problem is I've know I was trapped since when I hit puperty.... none of it felt right to me. And thank you ^^ I like yours too
Well, I wish I had more advice for you. You're in a tough situation, just like I was when I first came out. As far as how to tell him, its really however you feel comfortable. I chose to leave a letter when I went back up to school. It went remarkably not well lol, and she did tell me its not how she would have liked to find out, but in all honesty she's in total denial still and wouldn't have wanted to find out anyway. Also, I of course left out any mention of still being confused about my gender identity and all that nonsense. As for if it is a good time to tell them, that's really up to you. There is an element of risk to it. You are financially dependent on your father. He could likely react very positively and it could be very good to tell him. Of course the reality is it could go badly too. Only you can decide if its worth it for you right now. My guess is, even if he doesn't like the news, he will still realize you are his son and that he still loves you.
I hope your right. We just started walking a mile every night by ourselves. I am going to try to tell him within the next couple of days if I can figure out how to word it. Gah this is just so stressing me out. I really need to just go ahead and come out so I hopefully can begin on the path to what I truly want Thank you for the advice ^^
Your welcome. I understand it can be difficult. Coming home after leaving the letter is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life and its still painful to think about, but I'm convinced good will come from it eventually. I don't want to pressure you to make a decision one way or another, nor should you feel bad if you don't feel you can tell him yet. Its entirely your decision, and you are the only one that can decide your own pace. Have you told anyone else yet? It might help to practice on some friends before talking to a parent.
Well, when I told my parents and it didn't go well, I felt I had no support besides my bf (who had pressured me a lot into it in the first place). If you have a friend you feel comfortable talking to, and you think it could be helpful to talk to someone in person before telling your dad it could be helpful.
Awe, well your really nice ^^ ifyou lived around here i could talkto you about it even though I'm not good at expressing myself
Heehee ^^ ---------- Post added 6th Oct 2011 at 10:18 PM ---------- I would talk to you more but I cant PM yet ~.~
I'm pretty sure you should be able to. The only thing I noticed I couldn't do until I became a full member was use the chatroom.
hey. not to but in, but you can Write on peoples walls if you want to chat. You can use the chatroom or PM after your a full member (two weeks of EC plus a certain number of posts, then fill out the resume form and your set.)
