So i finally want to come out to my family but i dont know how i should do it. Im thinking of writing a letter to them so that they have a little space if the need to freak out or some thing. But my sister one of only two people in my family that knows im gay thinks that i should tell them face to face. I really dont think it would be a good idea to do that just because of how upset i think they will be. I no longer live in my parents house do i dont have to worry about if they are ok with it or not but i still want them to love me. Does any one have an idea of witch is better a letter telling them or telling them face to face. Please please put what you think up. Or any other ideas you could have.
You should do whatever is most comfortable to you, there is no right or wrong way to come out. If you do decide to do it face to face ask your sister if she will be there when you do.
Well, I used a letter. My mom reacted very poorly and she was really upset I told her with a letter instead of face to face. Of course she was just upset in general. I've had other people tell me it was really unfair using a letter. Of course if I had had to do it any other way I probably still wouldn't have done it it today.
When I've needed to talk to my parents about really important stuff that I was too shy to talk about face-to-face, I've written a letter to them before, and it worked fine. That's how I see myself coming out to them someday. But I think it depends on the family, and if your parents respond well to written communication.
Jon, I think it's unfair of them to call your actions "unfair". You came out in the way that seemed best to you - you did it being able to proofread what you were going to say. You were able to really think about how you were going to come out, and have your voice truly heard. There are no mid-coming out questions to throw you off track or your parents only half listening to you. It's the difference between "you're gay? Oh no no no not my son. Are you sure?" and "My son is gay. It's here in black and white." Good for you man.
