I just hate the fact that today, I've been humiliated yet again in front of so many people... I wasn't really to sing today for our activity if it weren't for my teacher's persistence to make me sing... If it wasn't for that f---king mini-concert thing, I could have not felt so much humiliation and depression to myself now... If it weren't for that stupid damn activity, I wouldn't so much hurt now... I wish somebody would support me but not even my family cares for my situation.... What if I come out as bisexual to those people? Will they even accept me? Not even my bestfriend helped my cope up with my situation... I just hate them so much... I don't wanna go back to school anymore, if I will get humiliated every time........................They just seem to be getting advantage of me and gai happiness whhile I cry.....
School can be a brutal place - which isn't right at all. School should be a safe place for everyone. If your teacher pressured you into doing something that you don't want to do, perhaps you can talk to them one on one after class some time to let them know that you didn't appreciate it, and that you suffered a lot of ridicule from your classmates afterwards, and that you'd appreciate it if they didn't ask you to do something like that again. At the same time, as hard as it might seem, you need to do your best to ignore the teasing that you get from some of the people at school. They're bullies, and they aren't really worth paying attention to. They pick on you only because they're really insecure about themselves in some way. So do what you can to not let it bother you, because their opinion doesn't really count.
i remember a guy who moved schools telling me that all gay's come out eventually and they might aswell accept it, but he was saying it in more of a offensive and derogatory way (with other comments im not going to say), and i was so keen on defending being gay, i was still in the closet then and he challenged my sexuality which i denied what i learnt is that you should have to worry, try to stay calm, you don't have to prove yourself to people who are just going to judge you, what alot of people do is place too much thought into a situation that might not even exist or be as bad. as long as you know what you want and have great friends there won't be any problems, you just have to face adversity to learn and grow anyways, so stay strong and show people the finger if you have to
I'm sorry for you. If I were you, I wouldn't pay any attention to them. People are stupid. When they make fun of you, act like it doesn't bother you at all. Laugh about it. Even if it kills you inside, just go along with it. This will give them that feeling that it doesn't bother you. In about a week it'll be all over and everything will be normal.
Firstly, if you didn't want to sing, I would recommend telling your teacher that. You really shouldn't have to publicly embarrass yourself like that. Secondly, I will admit, coming out to people in High School is hard. (For me it hasn't been as hard, due to developing a "Fuck you :***::***::***:" personality when people act like dickheads, but anyway). But in the end, you've got to harden up and ignore them. I will admit, it is a hard road sometimes. Remember, there is nobody forcing you to come out, and the repercussions from this performance will go away after a while. You need not tell them all straight away, and I can speak from experience, people grow up a lot over 2 years.
I'm okay now. I know it's kind of strange for me but if it wasn't for this experience, I couldn't have come out to my mother^^ And also, I think I might have just overreacted because I was feeling a bit weakened by some few stressful moments back then. Actually, my teacher said it all out loud a while this morning, "Don't worry about your performance yesterday anymore, Rex. Actually, I love it!" When she said it, many of the people at class actually started talking about how much effort In gave it. I personally thought what really happened was devastatingly embarrassing and it's quite fascinating that I made it to school today even if I cried for 4 hours straight (I even broke a door^^). What my teacher said this morning and how everyone else's impression of me got changed in a just a snap were quite uplifting. I guess getting embarrassed sometimes brings good things and it must have happened because someone just though I had to cheer up from so many years of being down. I should have not thought I got humiliated, I should have just thought I gave all my strength, my efforts and everything I've got to stand up on stage to sing for them even if it was against my own will. Nobody's perfect and even a guy like me can't cover up my own flaws. Everybody else experiences the same some time in their life; I should be grateful I have done it in high school, in front of familiar people instead of college. There are just a lot of words that want to flow out from my mouth, even if I can't still imagine how accurate was my understanding of my teacher's words. She might have meant it just to lift my spirits up. But no one cares about that now. What has gone by now is past. I should move on and I just have to rove I am something else. "I may be the worst croak at singing, but watch me, I'll be the next William Shakespeare." Haha, I think that's going wayyy too much Thank you for all your support, I appreciate it a lot! xoxo
I'm glad that you're feeling better about this situation. Yes - I think you've learned an important lesson here. We're not expected to be perfect! Nobody is. Accepting that we're not, but trying our best at whatever we're doing, is all anyone can ask of us. It's also important to develop a sense of humility. Be comfortable showing others that you're not perfect, and that in fact you have flaws. Because that's what being 'human' is all about.
I think you're learning. About how to act around people, and about how people react to how you act. One thing I'd suggest - OWN it. All of it. Own your insecurities, your less-than-perfect moments. Because you don't expect anybody else to be perfect or to always have their shit together, and chances are, they don't expect it of you, either. I don't know if you could preface your performance with "Well, I can't say as I was ready to perform this just yet, but apparently, today's the day. So I'll kick as much ass as I can." And if not, say something afterwards to those you know. "Just wasn't as ready as I wanted to be, but at least it's behind me now." Things like that reveal you as an open human being. Lex
Hey there I've had these moments too in highschool where I just didn't want to face my classmates because of something that (I or the teach) made me feel embaressed about. It's a natural part of growing up and I'll bet alot of people face it too. The best thing you can do is to still turn up with your head held high and knowing that you did it and nobody can say anything that will hurt you. A bit like sticks and stones. People will like you more for that rather than someone who runs away at the first sign of problems. I wish you all the best.
Thank you so much for your support, peeps^^. Actually, a while ago this morning, another friend of mine personally said she enjoyed my singing and she loved it. I asked if she really meant it and she said she did. She told me they all just laughed because I made a sound while singing that they didn't expect an amateur like me to do in a first-time performance. Well, she never lied to me ever before. Even if I get hurt, she tells everything straight from her face, and I believe her. I guess after all, it's all just me that got so much of myself and thought too much negative impressions before even realising how much have happened. Well, that's that. ^^ Again, thanks!
