Kinda annoyed and disappointed and worried

You're being jealous. Totally natural. How do you respond? I'd keep your guy in the loop. When you have some time alone, just clue him in. "I'll be honest - having Fred over is making me feel a bit jealous. I know I don't own you or anything, but this whole thing is kind of new to me, so I might need a bit of time to get more comfortable with it all." And while Fred is there, engage him. Consider him another would-be friend of YOURS in addition to a would-be friend of this other guy. Participate in the conversation, and have a good time.

Lex

 

Go back there, too. If there's a "do not disturb" sign there, send your friend a text. "I'm going out for coffee. Let me know when it's OK to disturb you again. " Then do it.

Lex

 

Then go in. It's your room, too, after all. They obviously left the door open so you CAN come back in. So go already.

Lex

 

I'm with Lex, go in there.
Also if the door is open then they probably weren't doing anything naughty.

 

And tell them you did it because the cartoon gargoyle said you could.

Lex

 

hows everything going with this guy? have you talked to him about how you feel?

 

must be kool to have those kind of dates....not there yet...we just have fun...

 

My special friends and I know why are like each other...so I guess I have never been through what you are sharing...sure sounds like it hurts deep inside...I hope u r ok.

 

Well, you probably would have been better off being honest when he asked you if it was okay. Because it isn't okay with you, but he probably thinks it is, because you said so.

You are just starting out with this guy--so, you don't really have an established relationship, and you haven't really set boundaries yet. Try not to be too angry--it's understandable that you are frustrated and jealous, but it's not completely his fault. You have a responsibility to be clear about what you want and what you are feeling.

But when he comes back, just have a conversation with him and let him know that, in the future, when the two of you do things together, you'd rather he keep his attention on you, and not on other guys. (This isn't too much to ask for even if you are both still seeing other people at other times--just, when he's with you, he should be with you.)

 

^ "When he comes back"? He's only coming back if the sex is really bad, or the guy's got a really early flight back home.

I can picture getting the same sort of post from your friend. "I met this guy online, and invited him to a gaming event in another town. He's a decent-enough friend, but I can't say as I feel any sparks with him. However, at the event, I met this other guy, and we really hit it off right away. This other guy lives kind of far away, and I'd like to hook up with him before the end of the event. Is that OK? What should I do about the first guy?"

And I would've told him to do roughly what he did. Because this stuff DOES happen, and I think he more or less did it right. He kept you in the loop. He didn't simply try to ditch you. Ideally, he hooked up with the guy in the other guy's hotel room, not yours. (It's one thing to lose your friend, but another to lose your temporary home.) You more or less said the right thing, but it would've been more honest to say "Actually, I'm quite jealous that you found someone to hook up with when you're still the only guy I know here. But I don't want to get in the way of a good hook-up. Go have fun. "

And, as I suggested above, assume you're not going to see him much for the rest of the weekend. Because you probably aren't. Chances are he's going to be spending time with the guy he DID click heavily with (either in bed or not). You might work on finding someone else to hang out with (if there's much going on - this might be the last day of the event), or you can just go explore the city on your own. Was it rude to "ditch you" in favor of this other guy? To a degree, yes. But guys have done far far worse for sex.

Lex

 

anyone who ditches u has issues and doesn't really care about other ppl. Be glad he is gone B4 he hurt u.

 

It's always hard when you want more from someone than he's ready to give. Just give him the time he needs. And keep your other options open as well--don't give all your attention to this guy. He's given you a lot of reason to think he is not that interested. There are other guys.

 

awe (*hug*) I'm sorry for what happened. It was rude for him to want to hook up while still with you. It was rude to 'add a third wheel' without asking you.

I hope you can move on and find someone better!