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I'm a non-drinker, and I don't know why

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by kunglaomksm, Oct 23, 2011.

  1. kunglaomksm

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    Many of my friends had invited me to drink and all of them I turned down. I don't know what's the reason for it but I don't really like drinking. I'm already 19 and it's made me the 'good boy' since all of my friends drink alcohol. It's so awkward when they are all drinking and I'm not. I think I don't like my friends(or me) to see my 'drunken personality' that most people have when they're drunk. I mean they(my friends) have their own side that I don't like when they're drunk. I kept thinking maybe if I get drunk that I will be exposed and reveal all my darkest secrets(I'm still closeted to my friends). Of course I still have this strong urge to come out to them but I want to do it my own way not the 'drunken' me. That's not what I'm wanting for advice for. I decided long ago that I would not drink ever and I'm doing a really good job at it, but what's my motivation of doing so? :help:
     
  2. British Lad

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    Some people Natural don't drink and some are born heavy drinkers, i myself am a light drinker, That found it in monkeys as well. you may not have be born with the taste for alcohol.
     
  3. Bran1977

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    I am never gonna drink or smoke...it killed ppl I loved...plus I want REAL feelings not drug feelings...
     
  4. Lexington

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    Why do you need a reason to not drink? I've never needed one. I've been a bit tipsy now and then after I've had my one drink too fast, but other than that, I've made it past my 40th birthday without ever being drunk. And it's been fairly easy to do. When people ask why I'm not drinking, I just say "I just don't drink." End of story. If they want a reason, I just say it again - "I just don't drink." If they buy me a drink or a shot, it stays on the table. "But I bought you a shot!" "And I told you I don't drink." And maybe they've got theories on why I'm like this.

    * He's hiding something.
    * He's a recovering alcoholic.
    * He's a pussy who can't hold his alcohol.
    * He's one of those people who hates people who drink.

    Honestly, I don't care what they think. I have no trouble with those that drink (although I resent occasionally getting the default "babysitter" role). I just don't. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
  5. Bran1977

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    why ppl put a toxic chemical in their bodies is something I hope I never grow up to understand...why make yourself sick? Maybe sick ppl like being sick...not me...medcine for pain is OK before they sow up with stiches or take something out of you.
     
  6. Kerze

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    Better to be naturally inclined to not drink than to have an addictive personality and end up an alcoholic by the time your 19. I know somebody who has deferred their place at university for a year so they can go into rehabilitation.
     
  7. Bran1977

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    I hope it works out and they get control of thier life...try to be there for him/her...it helps...my friend is trying to stay what he calls clean...he calls me all the time. When times get hard sometimes he has to go over and swim in our pool. All I have to do is listen and it makes him feel better. WOW...something so easy does so much good. Be a listerner...it is the best part if being a friend.
     
  8. Chip

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    Nothing wrong with not drinking, and you don't need a reason not to. My business partner and I go to conventions for the industry we're in, and the parties in the evening are absolutely crazy. Everyone there is drunk off their asses, and there's often a fair amount of pressure to drink. "What, you're not drinking? Let me get you a drink." "Oh, why aren't you drinking? Are you in AA?"... that sort of thing. But we just say "No, not something we enjoy doing, thanks." and people generally accept that. Plus you can carry around a ginger ale or a cranberry juice or a non-alcoholic daiquiri or something and people will assume it's a mixed drink and generally leave you alone :slight_smile:
     
  9. silverhalo

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    I dont drink simply because I dont like it, my friends do, thats fine by me but I dont.
     
  10. Alex15

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    I didn't drink until I was 20 I didn't go to parties with underage people who drink and it kinda sucked. Looking back when I did start going to parties (still not drinking) I regretted not being there with all my friends just hanging out for the three previous years I'd been ask to party with them. Did I catch some flack for not drinking? Of course but hey I was an athlete and just pulled the my body is a temple crap and they were all cool with it after the second party. Generally they were just happy to have me around. I guess the moral of the story is you dont have to drink if you go to a party. If you want to, do it. If you don't, then don't. :slight_smile: hope this helped!
     
  11. Rosina

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    I've never enjoyed the whole "drinking" thing as it is now. Personally, I'll have one or two drinks slowly through the evening if I go out just to loosen up and be sociable, but I never have gotten drunk before; I have never seen the appeal at all.

    I find now that I'm at University there is a huge pressure to get drunk. Particularly in the first few weeks with my corridor and kitchen mates, they were always asking me to drink with them in the evenings. I either just decline and chat for an hour or two, leaving when it gets rowdy, but most of the time now I just retire to my room. I hear them rushing around, screaming and laughing, crashing into things between ten at night and four in the morning and I just don't see how anyone could want to be in that state.

    Sure, alcohol reduces your inhibitions so you do stupid and silly things without much worry, but honestly? If I *really* wanted to go steal a traffic-cone or overturn a bin, I'd just do it, I don't need the excuse of alcohol in my system.

    - Waking up not remembering the night before and having to piece together what happened from Facebook pictures or friends' anecdotes;
    - Waking up in someone else's bed;
    - Hangovers;
    - Throwing up;
    - Getting alcohol poisoning;
    - Taking drunk friends to the hospital who dislocated limbs from falling over;

    All the above are things I think I can happily live my life without feeling I missed out on experiencing them.

    My thoughts :slight_smile:
     
  12. Drowzee64

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    You're not weird at all for not wanting to drink. Be assertive with anyone who pressures you to drink after you tell them no.

    I won't ever drink myself - I highly value clarity of mind.
     
  13. malachite

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    any alcoholics in your family? Sometimes we see the destructive side of things and swear them off.

    My sister is a huge pill head, hence I've never done drugs
     
  14. PicketFences

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    I don't think you need a reason to not drink. I know that I don't like the taste of alcohol because I have had a few small sips, but most of all I just don't see the need. I also don't like the idea of losing control, even a little bit.
     
  15. Robert

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    You dont have to drink. You could always go along with your friends and drink a coke or something instead. But if them drinking bothers you that much then simply dont go. Obviously you dont want to isolate yourself but Im sure your friends do more than just drink all the time.
     
  16. Hexagon

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    I'm pretty much the same. I have drunk (as the drinking rules are very lax in spain, where I used to live), my parents let me drink, and I could probably get alcohol in bars if I wanted. But I don't.

    You don't need a reason not to drink, but here are mine anyway: Beer has estrogen in it. Alcohol, no matter how little you have destroys brain cells permanently and I like my exact amount of brain cells. Lastly, I don't like being out of control in social situations, partly because thats just me, and partly because I have a past (aka transsexual past) to hide.

    So I drink diet coke. Its generally cheaper anyway. My decision to not drink is not temporary. I think the last time I drunk something was in June, and I didn't realise it was alcohol until I took the first sip. The last time I voluntarily drunk something was when I was 15.
     
  17. Ridiculous

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    I don't know why anyone would want to drink alcohol. Seriously, it tastes awful, makes you look and act like an idiot, costs far too much, and all those empty calories!
     
  18. Vesper

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    A few of my good friends have (good-naturedly, but still...) prodded me to drink more to let loose, but like you, I'm just not into drinking. It boggles my mind why people would allow themselves to get wasted when they know of all the negative consequences that can result?

    Your motivation for abstaining should be to retain your dignity and self-respect. Tell your friends that you wish to tell them something important, and that you wish to do it while everyone is sober. Hopefully they will understand and accept your request.

    I don't know about you, but people who would shun non-drinking friends for being bad friends or goody-two-shoes are not worthy of being considered friends. They should respect that their friends choose not to engage in this ritual of social bonding (Over taking pictures of each other stumbling around drunk and vomiting? Really?) and acknowledge that there are many very sound reasons to choose to abstain from drinking.
     
  19. MusicMan12

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    Yeah you're not weird at all. I don't drink either. And for those exact same reasons! I'm afraid that if I drink, I'd do or say something that I would later regret. And there's always the possibility that I would out myself haha. Nooo thank you...

    I don't have a problem with people that drink, as long as they don't get too drunk...then it just makes them look stupid
     
  20. RedState

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    For some reason alcohol plays a big part in the gay community, and there is a lot of pressure to indulge in it...and over indulge in it (over indulging has gotten me in more trouble)

    But some don't drink at all, and there is nothing wrong with this at all....and certainly nothing you should feel odd about. I know a lot of people that don't drink..even out in clubs...and it's perfectly fine.

    When you go out with friends simply stick with a coke, water or whatever. When I'm on the wagon I will drink club soda.

    But, I wouldn't be too concerned about it...sounds like you are on the right track. After all, it is fun at times being the sober one on the crowd and observing all the foolish antics of all the drunks :slight_smile: