about a month and a half ago, I started talking to someone on an online dating site. pretty soon we were texting/IMing/calling every day, and it was pretty easy to fall into a routine. one of us would text the other good morning, and then we'd text throughout the day as our work schedules allowed, and then we'd chat online at night once we were both home from work. i knew from the beginning her dad was seriously ill, but a bit over a week ago, he took a turn for the worse. she pretty much stayed bedside with him until he finally passed away on tuesday, so of course we have not talked much since he started getting worse. i texted her today just to tell her i was thinking of her and such, and she said thank you, and that she was laying low and struggling. told her i'm sorry, and that i'm here if she needs anything, day or night (which she knows, as i've said it before). so, i am not really sure what to do now. do i text her periodically to check in and let her know i care? just let her be and let her get in touch with me if she wants to? we of course have not know each other that long, but i guess the sense of closeness was artificially enhanced since we were in contact at length every day. before this, we were talking of meeting up, but hadn't actually done it yet both due to her spending all her free time with her dad (understandably) and hardly having free time to begin with, because of being extra busy at work (problems from the hurricane at the end of august). i like her a lot, but at the same time . . . my life has been on hold for the past four years when i was in law school, and i don't know that any reason is good enough to keep it on hold. i am talking to other people, of course, but i'm the type of person who likes closure and doesn't like to be left not knowing.
I think just remind her you care every now and then. She's hurting. Just be there for her, but dont be pushy.
I'd lay low, too. Maybe send her an e-mail or message once a week. Something simple like "Thinking of you." Lex
i'm kind of inclined to do that, although sometimes i wonder if she thinks it's strange that i would care enough to keep checking on her . . . i mean, we hadn't even met in person yet :/
Once a week isn't crazy. And it just shows that you are still interested--I mean, it was supposed to be some kind of potential romance thing, right? So, I don't think it's weird to let her know you're still around. Just keep on like you are, and talking to other people, staying in touch, and eventually she'll either have time for you, or you'll end up in a relationship with someone else.
