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is there something wrong with me?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by pronua, Oct 24, 2011.

  1. pronua

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    I think i'm depressed and I may have a social anxiety disorder. Whenever I'm in situations where I have to talk to other people in school, I get really nervous. I have no friends because I don't have the self-confidence to talk to people. At school I cover up my emotions and keep my sexuality a secret because I'm afraid of being judged. Sometimes I just feel like crying because I'm just a hopeless, shy, gay loser. Am I alone in feeling like this? :dry:
     
  2. ThisGhostOfYou

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    I felt the same way especially in middle school.
    The best thing you can do is talk to someone - for me it was my best friend (now my boyfriend) who was openly gay at the time. If you can find a trusted friend/family member/counselor to tell all of this to it could help. It helped me, but it takes a lot to come out to your first person. Hell, I'm still having problems with it.
    Right now, I'd try to come out to someone and hopefully they'll accept it and be willing to help you.
     
  3. Gleeko0

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    You are definitely not alone. I felt like that, exactly like you described... for a long time.

    I'm glad to say that i could overcome it, if i can you surely can too, it is not something that will last forever, but... you have to fight that anxiety, i fought it and thats the only way i know.

    You just moved to that school, right? So... possibly with time you'll get used to your new class mates and this feeling of anxiety will gradually go out. You have to gradually get used to talking to people, don't try pushing subjects or leading a conversation, at first just watch (even today, i do this many times) then make small commentaries you know won't be bad, talking to groups of 3 or more help for this as you won't be too pushed to talk, try to not be left out though, and just relax... you don't need to keep telling yourself "what should i say?" "i have to say something" or stuff like that.

    And try finding people compatible with your personality, people who have similar tastes and opinions depending on the circumstances these can be good friends for you.

    And...I advice you to not come out to anyone yet, i guess the best to do now is to get knowing with who you are dealing with. if these people have Homosexual or Bisexual friends and what are their thoughts about that.

    If you have any more questions please post. i will reply as soon as i can, and good luck!
     
  4. Gallatin

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    First off, you're not a loser.

    I've struggled with mild social anxiety disorder (SAD) for a long time. I also struggled with depression for a number of years. For me, talking to a therapist really helped things, especially with SAD. I would suggest trying to speak to a guidance counselor about what you've been feeling. If you have anybody close to you that you trust, that would be good as well. It's not healthy to keep these feelings pent up inside of you.

    Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more about SAD.

    Good luck!
     
  5. Sethrowe

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    I used to be the big man on campus then I moved and got too stuck up and yeah.... Now if someone says hey to me I normally just walk right past them and pretend they never said anything. If i were you I would make friends with one guy in a large group then slowly meet other people in the group through the first person... it works, trust me
     
  6. downward

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    I don't have too many friends in school except the time when i was in primary school. I felt lonely badly when i was in middle school. I was no confident to talk to people and generally, i didn't like people there and i din't think people would like me. Then i went to high school, my classmates were more friendly and some of them started to talk to me. And i realised that people were always willing to make friend with me and it was me who shut the door. I just need to talk more to my classmates.