so i have met a lot of guys lately online. I wondering how safe it is to meet up with them. Like I know not to rust everyone and stuff, and i know that u meet in a public place. But im still worried about it. Anyone who HAS GONE THROUGH THIS have any advice please and thank you.
I met one guy in person who I met online. This was so long ago that, at the time, I had to explain to people what it meant to "meet someone online". (Seriously.) Plus, this was before fast modem speeds, so the idea of "sending a photo" online hadn't really started. (Forget about Skype!) And to make matters worse, we lived 2000 miles apart. But I sent him a videotape of me on a television show, and he sent me a photo. And we finally decided to take the plunge. He bought a plane ticket to Denver, and we finally met in person. How'd it go? Not bad. We're still together, fourteen years later. My only caveat is this. I went ahead with this only after knowing this person online for quite some time - like nine months. We talked on the phone quite a bit, and we felt pretty comfortable with each other. And (you probably knew this was coming) I was 27 when I did this (and he was 30). So we both felt comfortable (if nervous) about taking the plunge. I'd be reluctant to say "sure, go for it!" to a 17-year-old unless I knew more about the other person, the relationship, and what you were hoping would happen. Lex
I've met with 2 guys that i talked to online, but i'm pretty careless so i wasn't really worried about it. I did make sure however, to talk to them on the phone before hand, and i did a lot of snooping online. If they had a profile on a social network i would check their conversations with other people, just to see how legit the person was. What i looked for, were conversations with his family (cousins, siblings, etc.) and friends, because what this told me was that the guy couldnt possibly have any serious ill intentions, since i doubt he would risk his friends/family to know about it. Also lots of pictures of him with his friends and family are a positive sign. If you met him online he probably has accesibility to video chat, so you can try that too, and sort of get a visual feel of the guy.
These days, meeting someone online is a lot easier than what Lexington experienced (great story by the way, that is pretty awesome!). If you can take example from Lexington, I'd say talk for a little while before meeting in person. Something I like to do is to request that person's Facebook (or whatever other Social Network he/she might be using). Doing this can at least let you know whether this person is real and not someone other than he/she claims to be. If that person is reluctant to surrender such information (most are as it is a private space), you could talk on the phone like Lexington had done. Talking on the phone is much better than texting. You can't get a feel for that person's intentions via text. Chrisyan mentioned snooping around for that person's Social Network to check if the person is legit. Though I find this to be an invasion of privacy (BUT I am guilty of it myself - so I can't judge :icon_bigg), you should do this too. At the end of the day, it's for your own safety and peace of mind. When you meet (and you've already mentioned this), meet in a public place. A mall is a good place to meet. There are plenty of people around and its easier to slip away if you feel uncomfortable. Oh and if you don't want to send a picture of yourself, you could always use Skype!
