So heres the story: i recently got into a relationship with a 16yr old girl,like a few days ago. shes cute and sweet, quiet but cool. there are a number of underlying problems though, one being my ex. her and i had a very physical encounter (our first) a few weeks back while we were still broken up and i wanted to get into a relationship again.but she said that she wanted to just be friends, which i was feeling hurt about. for more info check out my thread "Who does that?". So with all these mixed up emotions i rushed into a relationship with this other girl. i told my ex i was in a new relationship, wer still friends and id rather tell her than someone else. but now my ex was telling me yesterday that she said she just wanted to be friends because she needed space and time to get her head right after out encounter and because i came on too strong with the relationship need, it made her turn tail and run. i feel like such an idiot now, i should have calmed down and waited, i still love her and she feels the same, she was so upset by my new relationship. the big problem i face now is my gf, im now having regrets about this relationship and to make matters worse, when i told her again about me going overseas for two months in Dec because of family commitments, she knew before we started dating, she replied with "i think we should take a break during that time so that i dont feel bad if i do something" in the moment i said yeah thats cool, but in my head i was SERIOUSLY!!?? im not going to do anything while im away... she seems so immature to be in a committed reltionship, like when my ex and i were dating, she knew about me travelling alot and understood it and we called and wrote letters. but not my gf so heres the question: do i break up with her now before it gets too involved and spare some emotions? my heart isnt in this relationship fully...
I think you should leave the young-in.... She's obviously not ready to be committed, and I think its more of a game to her... Maybe dont be with anyone until after your trip? Just an idea.
It sounds like you still really care about your ex and more or less rebounded to this girl. I think you should end the relationship with her, since she doesn't sound mature enough for you and you don't seem that invested in the relationship. Afterwards, I think you should see if things might be salvageable with your ex. You say that you "still love her and she feels the same". If that's the case, it might be worth a shot.
I think you should end things with your girlfriend, it doesnt sound like its working, added to the fact that you still have feelings for your ex it is the fairest thing to do for all involved.
Well, there isn't a lot of doubt in my mind that the best option here is to call it off. You still love your previous GF, one of the big motivations of getting into this relationship seems to have been a drive to be in "a" relationship, and now that you're in one, your heart isn't in it... So staying in this situation is not doing anyone any favours. Sure, this girl might be nice and cute, but that doesn't mean you owe her a relationship for it. Breaking up isn't exactly fun, but I'm sure that in this case, it's better to decide this sn't working than to have it eat into your every waking moment.
thanks for the advice guys, i ended it with her, but boy did she give me what for, talk about emotional blackmail. she went on about how much she fell for me and i let her down and hurt her so much, we were only dating for a few days (?) but yah she made me feel so bad and she even turned suicidal on me, she had done it before we were dating but was so serious this time, i literally was scared to death for her life, i couldnt sleep and just felt so emotionally drained, i still do... but im not going to change my mind, shes too emotionally unstable...
If your heart's not in it, and she's basically asking for permission to sleep around or whatever while you're gone - then yes, end it now. You will only get hurt. Regardless of other issues - whether you're rebounding or not, how to deal with your feelings for your ex - if you're looking for a committed relationship and this is what she's offering you, I don't see a lot of promise. I rarely try to be so "you should definitely do this," but in all honesty, I've been in similar situations myself, so I guess it's my own experience talking. Ignoring "STOP" signs isn't healthy in traffic or in love. So sorry if this sounds harsh but I just like to see people stay happy. What the heck - maybe you can have a romantic, friendly fling while you're overseas (not sure where you're going to exactly) and give yourself a chance to unload some of this emotional baggage.
@gravity its not too harsh at all, i understan what ur saying im going to South Africa, back to my hometown, not sure about having a fling while im there, coz im still in an even deeper closet to my family there than here, but u never know what a meeting on a plane could lead to lol
