this is a mistake

Okay, I've bullet pointed this go go through

1) STEREOTYPE; Lesbians like piercings
2) Lots of people have lots of different interests. There's lots of things that I like that nobody I know IRL likes, but I can talk about with the gay people on this site. In the same way, there are things I like that people on EC won't like, but I know people IRL who like them too
3) More suggests that at least some girls are looking at you *NEWSFLASH* there are more straight guys in the world than gay girls, it's bound to be disproportionate how many guy are looking at you compared to girls, point is, they girls are still looking sometimes, and there's probably LOADS more who you don't notice. Anyway; boys are looking at you, so they must see something they like, take it as a compliment, even if you're not interested.
4) Okay then, don't cut your hair or loose weight, there isn't a dress code.
5) We all feel like this from time to time, some people just feel it for more time than others. It just comes with the tereory of being a teenager (and even more so being a gay teenager)
6) True dat.
7) Not everyone. There are some vile people who will tell you that you're 'wrong' for who you are and they aren't worth your time
8) Please, please, PLEASE DO NOT.
9) It seems like a lot at the moment but you just need to thin k of it as another part of your life. You need to think of being gay as a non-issue, something that's a good thing not a bad thing, something that makes you part of an amazing community of wonderful people. Just look at the older people on this site. The ones who have great jobs, and great friends and boyfriends and girlfriends and husbands and wives. This may have become a cliché but it gets so much better
10) Sorry, but being gay won't go away. And at the end of the day that is what you make of it, so make it a good thing.

You wanna have a contest? Bring it, I will take you down in shy awkward and unapproachable any day, any time, anywhere. (!)

 

To reiterate what Concretehands said, there really isn't a specific lesbian "look," they come in all shapes and sizes, with all sorts of hair and clothing styles. And lesbians like all sorts of other lesbians. And as for the facial piercing...I thought lesbians had a thing for facial piercings...I know I read a whole lot about them on EffingDykes (which I would really recommend you read if nothing, then to see how diverse the lesbian community actually is).
I understand how hard it can be to overcome the shyness as I myself almost didn't speak at the beginning of last school year when I transferred to a new school but try as much as you can and I am sure there are people willing to meet you halfway (or even two-thirds of the way).

And I can relate to the feeling of not fitting in or sharing interests with people. And sometimes I feel like I cannot talk to other girls particularly when they start talking about (ugh!) clothes or (shudder) start gossiping. But finding common ground with people is for the most part possible even if, on the surface you don't share the same interests. That said sometimes it really sucks not to have anyone to talk to about certain things. But as you grow older your circle of acquaintances will widen and you're bound to meet someone who shares your interests.

And yes, girls can be very, very mean. The female adolescent meanness is a category unto itself. Not all of them are though.

And please please do not think that you need to end it...there's so much more ahead of you. You being gay is not wrong, or a mistake, it's part of who you are and it should not prevent you from living a happy and fulfilled life. If you look at the LGBT community you'll see that. You're 17! What you are going through now is by no means representative of what your life's going to be like later.
and I think your last statement there pretty much expresses what many many people are thinking...Everyone wants to find someone to love them for who they are and it does happen but there's plenty of time for you...most 17 year olds I know (including me) aren't involved in any kind of relationship. Particularly any meaningful ones.
I think most people have felt the same way you do at least occasionally. I know I found myself nodding while reading it. You just have to accept yourself for who you are and once you do others will start seeing you differently and of course by then, their opinion won't matter so much. You being gay isn't a mistake...it's a part of you and all it means is that you're a part of an amazing community of people.
And at this point I'm going to stop myself from rambling. I know things may seem hopeless now but things are bound to look up. Hang in there.(*hug*) (*hug*) (*hug*) And if you need to talk more feel free to message me

 

Again, reiterating the above - don't feel like you need to change to fit someone else's definition of what's attractive or beautiful or lesbian. Everybody - and I do mean everybody - is somebody's type. It may not feel like it right now, but life is still very fresh for you, and you will absolutely meet somebody who thinks you're beautiful just the way you are some day. Who knows - maybe somebody thought that about you today!

I understand the pressure, though, and the urge to escape it all - I feel it too on occasion, I think several lgbt people do. But on the other hand, you're saying some really healthy things here. I particularly like this:

Good for you! Acknowledge what upsets you but never compromise who you are. That's the way to being truly loved.

P.S. Based on your description of yourself, I suspect you look a lot like a friend of mine - who has a girlfriend that loves her very much. Hang in there, you'll find yours!

 

The term "fit in" often reminds me of jigsaw puzzles. It puts to mind that somewhere, there's a Rooni-shaped void that you'll simply jump into, and fit perfectly. And that's really not how it goes, for everyone.

Let's take an obvious example - me and EC. Before I joined here, I really doubt any ECer was thinking "Boy, you know what EC needs? Someone in his late 30s or early 40s, who loves cartoons and rock music and giving advice, and is somewhat of a smartass." And I was some sort of answer to that prayer. Instead, I just showed up, started posting, got to know some people. And soon, I was a small part of the fabric that is EC. To extend the jigsaw puzzle metaphor (probably way past its breaking point), it's not like you're the "final piece" that fits in. When you start, you're like a piece all alone. But as you stay open, and get to know people, you start filling in that space around you. Some people you might click with on just a slight level, and that's fine - we all need casual acquaintances too. But others you might become friends with, and eventually, you might find someone to date, too. And these people end up "filling the space" around your piece. When you see someone who seems to be really popular, that's pretty much what happened with them - over time, the "space around their piece" filled in, so now it looks like they "fit perfectly". And eventually, you probably will too.

Lex

 

I know this is difficult to accept, but it will work out. This is what everyone told me when I was looking for a job last spring: Keep working at it, look in a lot of different places, be open to any opportunity that presents itself. I didn't believe them at all. I thought that I was unqualified and that I was never going to get the job I wanted. As it turns out I did get a job that I immensely enjoy, but it is not at all in the place I started looking.

Take the leap of faith and try not to worry too much.

 

The best move in this direction is to reciprocate. Accept everybody for who THEY are. Even if you think they're too stereotypical, or flighty, or anything else. Accept them all on their terms, and quite often, they'll do the same.

Lex