Hiya, I finish high school in 2 years (when I turn 16) then I'm moving to London. (That's definitely happening) and I was planning on telling all of my friends I'm gay on my last ever week/day of school. And if they wanted to ask questions, they have my number and my close friends know where to contact me. I understand that it won't go to plan EXACTLY and that I'll probably have to come out to one or two people before that time. In my school, people aren't homophobic, but they make jokes and stuff. I've never been the most confident person ever and I've got new friends now. For example, my best friend for 7 years through primary school didn't talk to me for 2 years (I said a few things on a school trip that got twisted and made to sound bad and insulting), and now were best friends again. And I do not want to lose her again. I'm a VERY good actress (and by that, I mean I can hide things really easily and people wouldn't suspect a thing), and am a bit of a teachers pet. Another thing about my lovely school friends is that they only call someone gay if it's a guy acting really camp and wearing make up which I think is stupid. I'm really quite butch and people have never even called me gay as a joke! Overall my school is pretty weird and I have under 2 years until I leave. I have to tell them on the last day because I've just stopped ditching and got back into school because of bullying, and I have to tell them because if I don't it will be on my conscience for the rest of my life. P.S my school doesn't have a support group, only a head of house, life skills teacher which I despise with all of my heart. Good plan or bad plan?
I know this is a super cheesy reply but: Just go with what you think is right. To me, I'm a fourth year university student and I just came out this year. I think coming out is a process that doesn't need to be forced. You KNOW when you need/want to come out. Its like, you knowing how to eat, breathe etc. There comes a time when you just know. One analogy I can think of would be throwing up. You know you need to throw up and will get better after throwing up. After you do throw up, it does seem to get better because its such a huge weight off your chest. So, I would say follow what your heart tells you; follow what you are comfortable doing. Note, there are a few factors you need to consider. Do your parents know? I can see this possibly blowing out of proportions to the level of your parents finding out. If you trust your friends enough? Will you still be in town after you graduate from high school? I'm sure there are more, I myself am not too experienced with coming out in high school, so I can only offer you these advice. One thing I would say though, i knew my friends would be supportive before I came out. Sure I had doubt, I mean, most of us probably all do, especially with all the media involving gay suicides and gay bullying. However, I have never been happier in my life after I came out (to my friends, not parents). I don't regret it. I used to be ashamed of who I am. Now, I love who I am and I love the people around me because I know they accept me for who I am.
I'll agree with Neek. I wouldn't plan on something too specific for two years in the future. If things don't seem right now, just stick with "I won't tell them right now". You can always re-evaluate sometime down the line. Maybe you'll decide to tell a couple people in a year, or a month, or none at all. Your call. Lex
