Everything was great until he showed up... FUCK! Im a 19 year old guy, considered myself straight, Ive had lots of girlfriends which I loved and had great sex with, dreamt with having the tipical white picket fence, 2kids, loving and sexy wife... and then he just showed up and ruined everything... Noww Im not sure of anything... ive never felt this way before, not even with my girlfriends... its just amazing, everytime I look at him I feel like Im flying, I think of him and I start to melt inside... and I try not to, I really try to like girls, even had sex with some to prove to myelf, but it just feels wrong, I try not to feel this way but I CANT, i just CANT ... All I know is that Im completly and irevocably in love with him and i dont know what to do... im still in the closet and im not ready to come out, i just found out im gay, my family is really conservative, my friends are all homophobic and GOD I feel this need to just break free and tell everyone but I know I cant because everything will change... the only good thing I see in this is that im sure he´s gay too!! Im dying to just tell him but I know I cant... what should I do???
It will be ok. Just take a deep breath. Why can't you tell him? It sounds like you could, to me. You should probably start just by coming out to him, though, and maybe let him know that you are interested in a way that is a little less dramatic than a full-on confession of eternal love. By like, asking him on a date. You can still have the kids and the picket fence. Well, if you can't manage the picket fence, it will be because of the economy or other reasons, not your sexuality. And a loving and sexy husband is not so different from a loving and sexy wife, and probably preferable if you think men are sexier. Make some friends who aren't homophobic so you have someone safe to come out to. Are you in school? Do you live with your parents, or what? What kind of situation are you in, in your life generally?
