Last week I was on top of the world. Things were just amazing and I was glad to be myself. My friends were being extra special friendly and just over all made me feel good about me. So after having a ridiculous homework party and ingesting tons of chocolate from Halloween, I started have thoughts about coming out, and ever since i have been in a constant starte if confusion and stomach knots. My two best friends and I have what I like to consider a 3-way bromance. Both of them are very touchy people. Hugs are a form of greeting among us, and they are not scared to get up in my personal space, if only to make me feel uncomfortable or spaz out if im poked in the stomach. Usually it would make me uncomfortable, but as i started feeling better about my self I have started "fighting back". One of me friends,(who we will call B) is especialy touchy. Request for my babies, my "lushes" thighs and my genitalia are regualr ones from B. He had a habit of Trying to freak my out or make me laugh by making increainglt sexual faces at me. He likes petting my face and scathing under my chin like a fucking cat. B likes to freak me out by grabbing at me when I'm not paying attention and A grope of my Chest,sides, thighs, and butt(on rare ocasion) are regaulr. In Short we are close. Normally my reaction would to be freak out, become uncomfortable or tell him to stop. but i realize its fun to play back, and just "flirt(?)" back. I have become more comfortable with myself and therefor more comfortable with the contact. However i have thought about coming out to him with my new found confidence. And then i realized, i have been changing alot as far as reactions go. What if he thinks then that i am coming on to him? While i am not in love with B he does set some standards for potential dates in the future. B had had a gf for about a year now so i dont think he is gay in any way shape or form, but that's not the issue. the issue is wanting to share something with a freind who will think i may be coming onto him with my new found confidence when in reality it is all in good fun. my other friend(Who will be A) im only worried about is because at one point i did have crush on him but that lasted about a week in which time i had not seen him an built him up into some amazing guy when in reality we are just good friends. If he does ask i want to be honest but i don't want the bromance we share to end. A is also a flirt but not as extreme as B but more "tender" i guess. As sated previously i dont want any actions in return to be seen as coming onto him. Im defiantly emotionlly closer to A and we share alot of secrets and problem. Naturally Its the two people im closest to is who Im willing to share this with first. Well as the past week cam to a close yesterday, my self confidence and desire to come out has died down. Im scared that if i ever feel as confident as i did in the past week that i may slip up and so something im not ready for. But to be honest right now i want to crawl and hide back in the dark confines of the closet. But i Remember how scared/Happy i was thinking about coming out and how happier i might be. I really miss that. On another note, this Thursday i am attending a Pride works convention. I will Be writing another post about that but basically i dont want it to encourage me to out myself to soon. to my freinds that is. I dont even know why i'm writing this but i guess my basic points are these 1) How ( if i do ever decide to come out) so i address these two friends about coming out, I do enjoy the relationship we share and the interactions. i just dont want such a nice friendship to end. 2) basic coming out advice 3) Any support and encouragement you can think of. any and all Responses have my thanks ahead of time
that is a hard one because i have never had a straight bromance with a guy and we touched and groped and grabbed etc. you can have close friends but B and you seem to be flirting in my opinion. I know you said he is straight but i mean, all this touchy feelie horseplay doesn't sound so straight to me. However, it coudl all be in fun but to me it sounds like you kinda like it a bit. i think if you want to come out to them they will both be ok with it. they play flirt with you anyway so it's nto like they are totally against the idea of someone being gay. who knows the flirting may even increase if they find out. i think you can be honest with them. if i had to tell someone first, i'd probably tell A. he seems more emotionallly connected adn you share more with him anyway. if he takes it well you can ask him what is the best way to tell B becuase you dont want things to change but you also dont want B to think you like him. Maybe A could have some advice.
Well, like I've told you before, I think you should wait until you're ready to come out. Give it some time and really think it through. You don't owe that information to them, so don't pressure yourself to come out to them. It's all up to you when (and if) you want to come out to them.
Also I realize i mad a mistake He has had a gf*. They are still happily dating and i made her cupckaes two weeks ago and i dont think they are seperating any time soon Sorry for the mistake
Well, I think that if they're truly your friends like you claim they are, then they won't care if you're gay or straight. More importantly, however, is that you come out when you're ready to and on your own terms. Good luck with whatever you decide, and lets us know.
