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Is it normal to "fall back"?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by unknown12, Nov 14, 2011.

  1. unknown12

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    I'm about to come out to my parents(this Friday), and every scenario about me not being gay is flying through my head. Iv'e come along way of accepting myself, but at the moment approaches I am having second thoughts. I feel completely numb to the world and to my sexuality now, because I have paid so much attention to it. I talked to my ex girlfriend today and kinda still have feelings for her. I don't know what those feelings were about. Not sexual though. It's like night and day compared to last week. Last week I 100% accepted myself as Gay now this well it's like 60%. Is this common, right before coming out to parents?
     
  2. BradThePug

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    This is normal, your just second guessing yourself. I went through the same thing when I was about to come out. I think more than anything for me it was nerves that cause me to second guess.
     
  3. Chierro

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    Maybe your feelings are changing, and you're starting to be more bi than gay. It happens rarely, but it happened to me...cept I haven't com out to my parents
     
  4. unknown12

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    I really don't know anymore. Like when I was hanging out with my friend today he was acting gay(he is deff straight btw) and i didn't even get turned on and same goes to most guys I look at now. My sexual feeling towards women are still none, but a spark I can't explain still exists. And like when I got home from my parents house, I felt incredibly weird like I was straight. I am very confused right now after being so sure of me being Gay. I'm shit scared to come out to my parents and I know everything will change. Is this me reconsidering who I am? Is this be trying to find normalcy in a changed environment?
     
  5. Gravity

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    Just my opinion, but quite frankly I wouldn't make too many self-image adjustments based on the fact that your feelings are suddenly in upheaval right before the time you had planned on for coming out. You mention several times how nervous and scared you are to actually come out - I think a lot can be explained by that alone.

    Also just my opinion, but if you really feel that terrified, you might consider waiting a bit. Or coming out in a different way than you'd planned (as in, I told my mom in face-to-face conversation, my dad in a letter). Whatever else coming out should involve, I think it should at least feel like a good and natural idea. Maybe a little scary, but definitely something that makes you think "yeah, I really do need to do this...here goes."

    If nothing else, put it on hold for a bit and see how your feelings change, if at all. That may tell you a lot about what's happening here.

    Just be honest with yourself, and good to yourself. That's got to be what it's all about in any case. (*hug*)
     
  6. Doctor Faustus

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    What Gravity said.

    Look after number one and number one is yourself.

    (*hug*)
     
  7. unknown12

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    Well I feel like I owe it to be honest with my parents. That's why I'm questioning myself. I need to tell them then and then only I think I will accept myself. But Thanks for telling me that I should be honest with myself. I know I only like guys and I guess i was trying to live up to my parents standards.