How do I tell a girl I really really like.. that I definitely only wanna be friends? I mean.. she knows I'm gay but I still feel like she's expecting more from me..I don't want to hurt her.. I care about her n she#s my only friend at school
This situation bugs me because it seems to happen a lot. If someone is gay, why do people of the opposite sex pursue them? Then again, I can ask myself the same question about always falling for straight girls.
If you think she can keep the secret, you tell her that you're gay. If you think she can't, then tell her "Trust me - you're the sort of person I could see myself dating. But I just don't feel anything other than friendship for you. Believe me - I've tried." Lex
Are you sure she's actually going after you? Sometimes people of the opposite gender feel okay being flirtatious or whatever around gay people because it's "safe" (kind of a reductivist approach to being gay, but there it is). I've had a couple female friends who do that kind of thing a lot. (And quite frankly, seeing how long it's been since I dated anyone at least marginally seriously, sometimes it's nice to have someone to flirt WITH. :dry So is that what this is, do you think? Or is she actually interested in you as a potential boyfriend?
Well, you could try being direct ("I really don't want to lose you as a friend"), or indirect ("how about so-and-so, I heard he likes you." or "I'm totally crushing on this guy over here, what do you think about him?"). I'd recommend at least some direct though. If she's being obvious it won't do you any favors to ignore her feelings, whether you reciprocate them or not.
tell her this: "hey (insert name) you're really cool and a great friend of mine and i want to be upfront and honest and let you know that i see you as a friend but nothing else and want to keep our friendship. im not sure if you like me or not but i dont want to jeopardize our friendship and i hope we can remain friends.
