I fell hard for a straight friend who didnt know i am attracted to women. we were friends for over 2 years, and i considered her a close friend. My feelings would not abate however, and i started feeling jealous and angry on her guy friends and when she's distant . I would suddenly become distant myself. We havent talked for a year now. There was no confrontation or anything. I just basically vanished. Being busy helped but sometimes, especially when things have calmed down, i start to miss her and feel like im not over her. sometimes, i want her to contact me but she hasnt all this time. If i resurrect the friendship, maybe i wont be ready anyway (or ever will be). I keep remembering how hard it is to be with a friend you like (and wont see you that way)..sometimes i even look her up online and her friends to see how she's doing. so if you guys have been in this situation, how did you cope?
When you remove somebody important from your life - even if it's somebody that was only important to YOU - it leaves a void. And the best thing to do when that happens is work on filling the void. Not necessarily by jumping into a relationship with the first person to offer, but just by being social, strengthening old friendships, forging new ones. My ex and I haven't really talked for over three or four years now. And occasionally I'll wonder how he is. But he's always been crap about contacting me, and I've decided I'm living a kick-ass life without him in it, so why bother bringing him back in? If you're not living a kick-ass life, maybe that's what you need to focus your attentions on.... Lex
