I'm back being depressed again and it's making me think of stupid things again. I've lost so many periods of school already and I can't even talk to anyone. Of course there's this site. But it really doesn't do anything really to help. Nothing is better than personal advice coming from people you know and not some random people you met online. So all I can do is cry myself to sleep. My friends think I'm a happy go lucky person but deep inside I'm a wreck. I know you can't do anything to help me I'll be more relaxed for the comments you'll leave for me. It's just hard being alone and If I think of what will happen to me in the future all I can see is myself being alone. So I say when i wake up in the morning "What's the point you'll be alone even if you find a good job in the future, you'll never have a family cause you're GAY" I don't know why but it made me want to skip school and just wander around and think of nothing. I know I'm being stupid when I'm depressed but I just can't hel it.
>>>Nothing is better than personal advice coming from people you know and not some random people you met online...My friends think I'm a happy go lucky person but deep inside I'm a wreck. But see, here's the difference. We know. We know you're hurting and in pain. And we're know the cause of your anguish. Your friends won't be able to help if they don't think anything is wrong. If you won't let them see the person behind the mask, they'll keep responding to the mask instead. So give it some thought. If you want the advice and support from those closest to you, they'll need to know that it's needed. Lex
You seem quite unhappy, from one stranger to another, I want you to know that me and many others love and support you. Shoot me a pm whenever you like.
Hey man don't worry that was exactly me in High School. I was always the "people pleaser". It was the most difficult time of my life because I had to hide it from my parents and friends. So for 4 years I felt like static. Everyone came to me about their problems, but I could not share mine. Now i'm in college and i'm dealing with it, it may still not be a good time for me. But i'm realizing that me confronting this, made me feel better already. I feel more secure of myself and feel more confident that I can take care of this. And yea man, I always thought that I could not have a family too. But I realized that that information came from ignorant people. I Went and cried with my Bible and bargained my soul away to be straight. And then one day in my darkest hour, I saw a angel. The light coming from the object was the purest white I have ever seen. I sought solace in knowing that maybe this was all God's plan. Maybe God knew I was going to be gay, to teach my parents and friends tolerance. If you want take a non religious route then I would find a hobby and stick with it until you are out of high school. If you do not want parents to know, try to go to a university and enroll as a full time student. If you do this then your parents will not know if you go seek professional help. If you see a counselor on campus then nobody will know you went, it does not even show on your transcript. So if you do not want you parents getting suspicious then I would take the route I just suggested. If you feel the need for immediate help and actually speak to to a person, then I would look up Gay youth hotline's on Google.
kunglaomksm, there are so many of us who know and understand what your going thru and how you feel. Just know that here you can find anyone at any point in time that understands how your feeling to some degree. Even tho I don't personally know you, know that I care about you and want nothing more then for you to find peace inside yourself!
