Since I've started coming out to people I've started feeling really awkward around them. The first person I told was one of my closest friends and she was happy for me and has been there to support me since, we even discuss people we like and don't like but I still get an awkward feeling whenever we do and then I have to change the subject for a while so I can feel comfortable again but we always end up coming across a nice looking guy on the t.v and it's just back to feeling awkward again. I came out to my sister last week (she already knew but I just confirmed it for her) and she was interested about how I knew I was gay and who I liked but again I just got too awkward with it and had to change the subject. I haven't stayed in the same room as my sister for longer than half an hour since or even had a small conversation with her, it's all just one word sentences to each other, which is horrible because we are pretty close. My sister did tell me that I should tell my mum about it though and reassured me that she wouldn't freak out or yell at me or anything. I waited until me and my mum were alone (it was really late because she had just come home from work) and I told her. She took it amazingly well, she just told me that she loved me no matter what and I was quite happy with myself for telling her but with it being so late we couldn't discuss it properly until a couple of days later. She called me into the living room and told me to shut the door, she was crying aswell so I thought she might have been having trouble with it, it turns out she just wanted to have a bit of a chat about it and make sure I was doing ok with it. Since that chat though I can barely ask my mum what day it is or even look her in the eye, I feel so uncomfortable around her now that I've isolated myself in my bedroom, only coming out when I need the toilet or something to eat or drink. I wanna get passed all this awkwardness, everyone who knows is happy for me so why can't I just be happy for myself. How can I just feel normal and ok with who I am and be able to be myself again, the way i was before awkward feelings got the better of me...
Woah...quite frankly, I'm not sure why you're awkward just normally talking to your sister or your mother. They're both fine with you being gay right? Then there's shouldn't be any pressure being just yourself. Unless you think coming out is suppose to be like...*BAM* you're all of a sudden a different person? But the truth is, you're not like that (right?). But I have to say, congrats on coming out and if this helps at all, you should be happy not uncomfortable that your family is cool with it. So, what I want to say is, you should just be normal you. Nothing has changed, so go about your business as usual.
Your mother and sister are a little bit ahead of you in terms of accepting you. The awkward feelings will pass in time, but they will pass more quickly if you try to tell them about how and why you feel so awkward around them. If you don't tell them somehow, they won't be able to tell why you're distancing yourself from them, and it could put a strain on your relationships with them.
Good for you in coming out. That's awesome. It IS a sensitive topic to discuss, and I can understand you and others around you feeling a little awkward. It's still like 'the elephant in the room' and you're not sure what to say. One thought might be that you could bring it up without really bringing it up. You could say to your mom, or your sister, "Hey - I just wanted to thank you for being so supportive and for not freaking out when I shared my 'news' with you. That meant a lot to me." That way, you've talked about it in a way that should allow everyone to be comfortable. And just stop barricading yourself in your room. You're giving others the impression that you don't want to see them. Or that you're embarassed. Or that you're angry. And you really don't need to be any of those things. So force yourself to get out of your room. You'll feel better for having done it.
Well just congrats on telling them, and I don't doubt the awkwardness will pass in time, but I agree with everyone else in that if you isolate yourself from them it might take longer in order for it to feel "normal". The important part is that they're happy for you and you're probably not used to being that vulnerable and open. Just relax, I'm sure everything will get less awkward. My one friend was like that, the second person i told, and everytime I looked at her, she just smiled almost in disbelief, but I didn't let that become awkward and neither should you. Try to think of it as liberating, and let them know that you still have boundaries even though you're out to them.
I felt very ackward after I told my sister and my father... Not about every conversation, just about me being a lesbo. Hmm... I think you shouldn't avoid talking about the subject. Not only that but force yourself to take one step further everytime. Baby steps, maybe... but still steps. Maybe you can mention your ackwardness to your friend and tell her to ask you questions on the regard. I felt also very ackward when I first went to Pride and the first time I went to a gay bar... Definitely outside my comfort zone, but I knew I had to do it. Why should I allow myself to grow comfortable with being out?? There's nothing wrong with being gay, then why was I uncomfortable?? I forced myself to go to Pride, gay bars and LGBTQ reunions. Telling Queer people might be a good idea because you're pretty much in the same situation. While discussing Queer issues, I feel more comfortable with Queers... because well, we're on the same situation... and I don't have to explain certain things that are so obvious for Queers (like Kinsey, Hite... why many of us feel attracted to opposite sex, yet that doesn't make us 'bi'), but no necessarily for Straight People. That said, some Straight Allies are hardcore... fighting on our side. XD
