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If you had depression, did this happen to you?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by TheAnonymity, Dec 3, 2011.

  1. TheAnonymity

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    I've been depressed for over a year. Just a few days ago, I guess it all sort of boiled up. I was sitting on the bus going home, and my friends (which I barely talked to at all because I isolated myself and that 'weight' you feel when you're depressed blocked me from talking to them) were talking and then they said how I used to be really funny but I don't talk much anymore, and I don't know, I guess I just got really frustrated and it all boiled up and then shortly after I was feeling fine, I guess if you call it that. The heavy burden (the "weight" as people call it) wasn't really there anymore.

    I think it was a breaking point. I don't know if everyone gets out of depression like that. I think there are three types of breaking points (at least three). One, is nervous breakdown. Two, is what happened to me, where you get so frustrated and tired of it, the "weight" (more of a wall to me) shatters. It breaks and you're free. And of course, unfortunately some people also are so frustrated and tired of it that they kill themselves.

    I feel normal now. The weight is just not there anymore. It's great really. I can scream 'NOTHING CAN DO ANYTHING TO ME!' without regret or knowing that it's not true, because it is. (If you'd like to know why I screamed that, read this: Hyperbole and a Half) I screamed it in my mind of course. It'd be a little weird if I randomly shouted that on the bus.

    I'm being careful, watching myself in case depression pops up again. It's sort of like where you've gone through an infection or something of the sort and the doctor tells you to watch yourself for the next few days.

    Feeling normal again is great.

    So, yeah. Wanted to say that. I'd like to know your comments on this.
     
  2. BradThePug

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    I had that happen to me. It happened to me on a bus coming back from a marching band event. I was talking to a friend and we were talking about the past, and how things were different. I don't remember what she said, but I just remembered feeling free all of a sudden.

    I've had a couple of relapses since then, but they were not nearly as long or as bad as my first bout.
     
  3. Noir

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    That's amazing--I've never heard of such a successful attempt to conquer one's own depression! I guess a lot of it really is in your head--"you can do anything if you out your mind to it!" I don't know how many times I've heard the phrase, "you're the only one who can make you happy." Good for you!(!)
     
  4. throw

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    I've never experienced that. My most recent bout with depression is ending. Over the course of a few days and because of some unrelated, but inspiring events, I realized that I really can do anything that I want to do with my life. I felt less trapped and lost. The depression is lifting. I hope that this will be the last time that I have to deal with this, but if not, I'm learning ways to help myself come out of it.
     
  5. WSPXRT

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    I had a nervous breakdown and took a week and a half off of work. I'm in the middle of considering changing residencies with the heavy burden of medical school loan debt, home mortgage and depression stemming from facing the denial of my own sexuality for the past 29 years. So i'm in the isolation, unfunny, heavy cloud phase. Unfortunately coming to terms with my sexuality will not fix the job and debt issues. Double whammy.
     
  6. Pilgrim is hot

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    I don't know If I have ever experienced any of those three steps tbh, I find sometimes it fades away but usually it's because I just bottle it up and carry on (yes I know a stupid thing to do) I've heard talking to people really helps so that's where I'm trying to get to.
     
  7. BudderMC

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    I don't think I've had anything that sounds as awesome a resolution as that, but there have definitely been periods where I'm feeling down for no particular reason and I'm listening to relatively mellow music. After maybe a couple of days, tops, I usually hit a point where I'm just feeling tired of being bummed, and feel the need to switch to upbeat music.

    Kind of an "I wallow in my sadness for a bit to get it out of my system, then feel better afterwards" deal.