hello guys! So I officially welcome myself to this website which when I was creating my account accused me of a spammer :dry: this is my first thread(sorry for my bad English :tears: ) back to the topic, is it normal that I am most attracted to guys older than me? not old like dinosaur old xD let's say, like 5 or so years? 7 at most. in my life, I only admired one person of the same age, not because of his face but because of his attitude that makes me want to take care of him while always has been attracted to older people. can someone tell me how is that? :eek: Also: I'm still questioning my gender so please tell me if there's a pattern upon knowing your real gender and I think if I am queer, I will be the weirdest queer in the school because I don't hang out with queer guys and I only like colors black,white,gray,brown and blue unlike my queer classmate who likes rainbow colors much (or maybe that was quite stereotypical). ---------- Post added 9th Dec 2011 at 08:32 PM ---------- Anyways, I don't have any desire to have a vagina and or boobs.
Welcome! I'm sure you'll love it her And its totally normal to be attracted to someone older, happens all the time. With me even, I've always liked older girls in their 20s and up. It all depends on the person and what they're attracted to, perfectly normal. I can't say much about the gender stuff because I know nothing of it but there are plenty of people here that can maybe talk to you about that! But I can say not all queers are made alike, I generally detest the other queer girls at my school(because of their personalities) and only sport rainbows when I'm trying to get noticed by the other lesbians out there. And black and dark/midnight blue ate my favorite colors!! And teal lol Hope this helps a bit! <3
Welcome to the site =) While I don't know any statistics on gay/bi men's age of preference, I know cross culturally women on average find men that are about 3 years older than them most attractive. Thus, I suppose it makes sense for a gay/bi man to also be attracted to older men. I'm a little confused by this, Is there another reason you are question your gender, or do you just think that most gay guys do want a vagina and boobs? Also my favorite colors are probably green and pink.
It doesn't sound to me like you are transsexual. Do you want to wear women's clothing, or anything like that? Do you want to be called "she"? As far as liking older guys, that is common enough. People have all different preferences, and that's fine. Are you concerned about your gender because you want your partner to be more dominant in the relationship, and you think that makes you feminine? But you say that the one guy you liked that was your age, you liked because he made you feel like the protector or caretaker. Did that make you feel more masculine? It might be harder for me to give you advice, because I am not as familiar with your culture. I'm not sure how your culture defines gender roles or sexual orientation.
Don't worry about liking older guys. I have some young friends who prefer men who are 20 or 30 years older than they are. They are happier being with older men for some reason or another. Don't let yourself be put into a box by thinking what you "should be" or "shouldn't be". You should go with where you are the most comfortable and not by following the conventions of people around...even if those are people in the gay community around you. You'll be happier if you are just yourself without pretenses and without bowing to pressures. And, please, don't worry about your favorite colors! Not all of us gay guys wear rainbow colors--in fact none of my friends do! And I'm gay, and I'm very happy with my equipment: my penis and balls. I have no desire to have a vagina or breasts.
^ Pretty much what Tracker said. It's what you feel most comfortable with doing that's most important. I'm very happy being male too! XD
Wow. I'm completely normal. Thanks for this! I'm saying based on my experience, since most or maybe all of my gay(male) classmates do want boobs and vagina and sometimes act like they have in front of us. That gave me the idea that maybe all gay(male) do want the female organs. :icon_bigg Thanks. it helped me feel normal and not awkward (*hug*)
Liking older guys, or just people to be general, is normal. I, myself, am attracted to this one guy who is around 20 or 23. And I, for most reasons, don't find it that awkward. I don't think there is any pattern in knowing what you really are when it comes to your orientation. The teenage years are practically known to be the most fragile years of a person's life where most of the mind-boggling changes happen. If you feel that you are queer, better start asking with the plain questions "To what gender am I most attracted to?" and "To what gender do I fit well?" From there, you can take it. Also, about your qualities, ignore the others. Not all people have the same tastes. There's nothing really awful being different from the others. Try to think about it in a way that you stand out nicely. P.S. Your situation kind of reminds me of "Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros" XD Sorry for that
Gay men do not want female organs. People who want to change their bodies that way are called transsexuals. Some gay men are very feminine. Gay men who are not feminine are more difficult to notice if they are not with a partner. For this reason, you may think there aren't any around. But YOU are around, and you are only attracted to men. In my culture's definition of these things, that makes you gay. (Other cultures define things differently.) Okay, so I went and looked up LGBT culture in the Philippines and subsequently Bakla. Do you think those Wikipedia articles are accurate? Based on those, your culture has a third gender, which includes people that in my culture would probably identify as transgender or in some cases as the more feminine gay men. Under western influence, this can be mixed up with gay identity. That is probably why you are confused--before Western influence, your culture probably did not have a separate category for masculine men who are attracted to men. In non-Western cultures, it is common for there to only be categories for masculine and feminine men (and women), and not for same-sex attracted people. But then, under the influence of Western culture, the categories for feminine men and masculine women get associated with the idea of being gay (attracted to the same sex). Before contact with Western culture, "bakla" was probably not considered the same gender as "man," and they probably partnered with "men." The men who partnered with them would not necessarily have been considered bakla. Now, "bakla" has become associated with Western ideas of being gay, and so there is confusion about whether any man who partners with other men or with bakla should be considered bakla. It is difficult for you to know whether you are bakla, because what the term means has been changing. Since I don't belong to your culture, it is even harder for me to know whether you should be considered bakla. In my culture, you would definitely be considered gay, but it's not the same thing. Different cultures draw the categorical lines in different places. (<----That's what it means when we say that "gender is a cultural construct." That, and that the way gender is expressed is culturally defined.) In my culture, there is a categorical line between transsexuals and gay men, even if the gay men are very feminine, and there is not a categorical line between feminine and masculine men of the same sexual orientation. Your culture traditionally has a categorical line between bakla (feminine men and male-to-female transexuals) and masculine men, without regard to sexual orientation, and transsexuals were not considered separate from the feminine men--they were all bakla. So, even though we have the same spectrum of gender and sexual orientation, the categories we divide them into do not match across cultures.
