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Hurt Feelings

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by katmando, Dec 16, 2007.

  1. katmando

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    Hi Guys:

    I was outside running today and I have been struggling quite a bit lately with my OCD/anxiety and my sexuality.

    Anyway, I know what these guys did was probably totally random, they were high school looking guys & they opened there window and started *YELLING/SCREAMING* the f'bomb at me as well as other stuff at me, but couldn't make the rest out) My first question to myself why me?? And why did these people have to be such JERKS. I know they probably did not know me since I was wearing a hat and had a few layers of clothing on me. But not totally sure.

    Nonetheless, it still hurt my feelings because first of all I don't enjoy the f bomb thrown at me, even if they were trying to be funny and even though they were probably strangers. It just reminded me so much of the teasing that went on in high school and being called a "faggot" & even though I do not think they called me a "faggot" that's all I could think after they started screaming stuff out the window. Even if they did call me a "faggot" I have to keep in my mind it was most likely random.

    Its weird because as I was running and as soon as I heard that comment I got light headed, dizzy and literally thought I might faint, after I heard this, It brought all the high school memories back, and I felt like someone stabbed me with a knife.

    I see a new doc in the next few weeks who can prescribe medication and hopefully he can help me find some medication to take some of the edge off all the anxiety and OCD I am struggling with.

    Thanks for letting me share
    Justin
     
  2. Ty

    Ty Guest

    Don't worry about it, some people are just stupid and have nothing better to do with their time. Really, don't get insulted by random idiots who only get kicks out of causing other people distress, it'll all come back to them one day =]
     
  3. Psychedelic Bookmarks

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    i'm sorry to hear about all that. all i can say is, i sympathise entirely, and i send you an enormous cyber-hug. you are welcome to share here anytime you want. i hope your new doc can help you. good luck and take care! =]
     
  4. Étoile

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    I think we (humans) just like to cause pain for others for no apparent reason just like we like to create joy for others too. There's nothing wrong with you; they were just being idiots and it will come back to haunt them. Karma's a bitch!

    Here's another cyber-hug to make ya feel better.(*hug*)
     
  5. Jim1454

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    Hey Justin. Consider this totally random. I had young guys yell at me a while ago when I was out jogging. I can't even remember what they said but they just kept going...

    Not sure why some people do this. They just don't have anything better to do, and think so little of themselves that they need to pick on others to make themselves feel better.

    Good luck with the new doctor too.
     
  6. SpikySpice

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    Im sorry to hear that, I have to say th meanest people are kids fom highschool, those kids are just so immature so just forget about them, Im struggeling trhough my junior year now, dang, next year Im still a Senior, cant wait to get out thsi horrible enviroment

    But not only highschool kids are mean, lots of others are too, different ages. It's life an dit's like that, most people like that arent have a good time when they get old, it's fair that what you do to people, you'll recieve it

    Im sorry for what happened, I hope you feel better now:slight_smile:
     
  7. Louise

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    (*hug*) (*hug*) (*hug*) How are you doing now Justin?

    I hope you have managed to push this from your mind. Unfortunately there are all too many mean and stupid people in this earth which are the baine of sensitive people's lives. I am really sorry that this happened to you. You are doing so well at the moment, don't let this get you down. :kiss: :kiss:
     
  8. katmando

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    Thanks for the kind words. I have been doing a lot better and finished my 3rd week of work. I am working about 40 hours a week or a little over.

    I still am somewhat triggered by this event. I guess here and there. When I am out running lately if people stare(probably because I am running in 20 degrees) or honk(like tonite did, because it was dark and I was on a sidestreet), I think of those kids. And still can't figure out why people scream mean things at people who are just exercising)

    I know it was random, but my head also just goes back to high school after stuff like this happened and I think of the people that bullied me (Sometimes and although not rational, because its 10-14 years after the fact sometimes I think it was the actual who bully was yelling the f bomb out the window. I know that, that is just my head playing tricks on me. I also know I need to move on from high school, but some stuff never totally goes away, but I am glad I am no longer sitting in my apartment letting life pass me by)

    Nonetheless, thanks for everyones kind words since I joined this site. I am proud of the stuff I have accomplished. I have made a ton of progress, but still have quite a bit of work to do on myself. I also now need to work on making friends. I thought I want a relationship with a partner/boyfriend first, but I think just friends in general would be good for me.

    Justin
     
  9. Hollywood

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    Yeah, don't about it. High school is full of bitches (I'm one of them) who do random shit like that. These guys I knew drove by this guy running and yelled "smoke weed every day!" for no aparent reason tonight.

    People are just stupid sometimes. It was nothing geared at you for any specific reason. You were just there.
     
  10. Lexington

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    A couple gay friends and I were out walking a couple summers ago. A car drove by and the passenger yelled out, "Faggots!" To which I yelled back, "Thanks for noticing!" Everyone laughed, even the guy in the car. :slight_smile:

    Glad you seem to be getting on top of things.

    Lex