Ok, I have been seeing a few posts talking about lgbt youth being told to go to Christian counselors and now I feel bad about giving the wrong impression about them. My family really wanted me to go and talk to one so I went. I was expecting such a mental and emotional barrage but it was so far from that. We began talking about frivolous things to break the ice and then we got into the more serious stuff. He began very calmly bringing out the condemning verses and I shot them down one by one. I never raised my voice and was always very clear about my beliefs. When I started throwing out my own refrences and thoughts he closed the book he was reading from and just listened. He even told me that I know more about the bible than many people he spoke to. I believe I changed a few opinions of his own. I am not really asking a question here but am just offering help to anyone who has been told to go to a counselor. They are all held to the strictest confidentiality and cannot tell anyone what you say. They will also never say anything to hurt you or make you feel bad. If your family wants you to go, or you just want to talk to someone I strongly recommend this option. Just go in calm and know where you stand so you can explain yourself. Be strong, you will make it through this! Please if you have any questions I will answer them, I will do anything I can to help you.
I'm curious to know some of the things you two talked about in detail. I know that thee bible will come up when I tell my mom since she is very christian. Can you share some of your knowledge with me? Id really likke to be educated on the bible verses and stuff
I'm really happy to hear you had the positive experience you did, and I know of at least a couple of others at EC who have had similar experiences. There's also a fantastic documentary, called "Camp Out" about a group of devout Christian gay teens and the church that organized a summer camp especially for gay teens... wonderful and very positive movie. But I also have to talk about the abysmal experiences some people I know have had with Christian counselors. One friend of mine desperately needed therapy, and his parents would only pay to send him to a Christian therapist, so they found one with impeccable credentials - Stanford Ph.D., supposedly extensive experience with teens and young adults, etc. On the second session he had with this woman, she told him "There's nothing you can do, and you're going to be stuck with a miserable life unless you open up to Jesus Christ. Prayer and accepting Jesus is your only option to be able to have a happy and healed life." This person, who had been struggling with drug addiction and had been clean for 2 months, almost went out and went on a drug binge. Fortunately, his friends were able to talk sense into him, point out how incompetent this therapist was, and get him to a therapist that was actually competent. I seriously considered filing a formal complaint with the state regulatory board on this therapist, but ultimately decided not to get involved. I do think there's a generational divide and younger Christian counselors are more openminded and realistic than their older counterparts. But in any case, I do think one has to be cautious.
ICTOAUN, This is going to be a long one but I will try not to write a book. When we started talking about homosexuality he prefaced it by saying he has known gay people all his life and they have always been in a positive light for him. He then wanted to know how I knew, how long I've known and everything up to my sexual activity. The entire time he seemed infatuated with my story, always stopping me and asking about the little details, making me feel even better and more comfortable. Ok now what I believe you want to know is how I was responding to the verses. With sodom and gamorah I let him go through the most of the story until the angel entered Lots house. This is when I took over talking. I explained how that city was a disgusting place and was overflowing with sin, none of which was homosexuality. The men of that city wanted to RAPE that Angel, not have consentual gay sex. The reason that city was burned down was because they did not welcome an outsider as if he were their own. Next is Leviticus, the biggest wall of a verse we need to climb as gay Christians. Now I didn't let him bring this verse up, instead I put it out there and started talking about it. First I quoted the reference and also the verse which really seemed to surprise him. I began explaining that I don't feel leviticus is important to my Christian walk because a few verses before says eating shellfish is an abomination. Also round haircuts and wearing clothing of mixed fabrics is an abomination. By the way an abomination is something that is looked down upon or thought to be out of the norm at the time it was written. Now comes almost every other verse about homosexuality, they will say "If a man lies with another man as if a woman..." Okay here is where I can only give a few details but you need to do your own research and decide for yourself. Through all of my reading and studying I believe these verses are talking about straight men, men who give up their "natural ways" if someone is born straight and has gay relationships that is a sin, just like a gay person having straight sex. I apologize if this was too long but I'm only part way done. What specifically do you want to know? Is there one verse or scenario with your mom your worried about? ---------- Post added 20th Dec 2011 at 06:38 PM ---------- This is so sad to hear, maybe I just got lucky but I have to hope he was just a bad therapists. The thing is the man I spoke with was in his late 60's and he was so easy to talk to. He seemed like his first and most important duty was to help me. He even went through a Christian college to get his degree, so I must believe the counselor your friend spoke with is just an evil person using his position to hurt already hurting people.
Thanks jake v . no, there is no specific thing that I think my mom will bring up. I just wanted to know your perspective on homosexuality and the bible (and I agree with you). Thank u for sharing some details!
No problem, I wish you all the luck in the world. It's gonna be tough for a while but you and your family will get through it.
This article might be of use to you guys: What the Bible Says - And Doesn't Say - About Homosexuality
