Soo, if you couldn't've guessed, I'm not in the best of moods. So here goes: It turns out my bestfriend has been lying to me for the past year, and now I'm broken up inside. I don't know how to even begin to forgive him. He did what he called a prank gone to far, which most of ky friends just was a sick, cruel joke, to me and I don't know how to forgive him. And frankly, it doesn't even seem like he's trying at all to get my trust back On top of that, I think I'm falling for one of my best guy friends. He's straight. We're really good friends and can joke and talk about anything together. But he doesn't know I'm bi or that I have a crush on him. I mean I think he's straight since at work this summer we wound up talking about hot girls during the day. But my aforementioned bestfriend thinks he could be bi...just to keep me happy and optimistic. And my one friend Abbie thinks he's gay just because of how cute he is. So any help to deal with this is happily wanted. Merry Christmas everyone
An extensive practical joke seems like it would be a terrible thing to suffer from. It will take time to forgive him and if he doesn't want your trust back then he's not worth getting your time. In terms of falling for a friend of yours, don't confront him directly about the possibility of him being bisexual but instead (maybe at some point in the future) come out to him as bisexual and see how he responds to it. Once he knows you are bi the ball is in his court (so to speak) and if he is interested then he can make the next move. If he is indeed straight confronting him about being bi might panic him and if he is indeed bi but still coming to terms it could panic him also. The best route is, as I said before, putting the ball in his court and letting it go from there.
I think holidays can be a difficult time for everyone- theres so many emotions and expectations in the air, and people inevitably can't deal with them all. That being said, what your friend did to you was wrong if (as I'm assuming) he was being intentionally hurtful. Right now, I wouldn't stress on "how to forgive him"- you can allow yourself to be angry. But don't let that anger dominate everything else you're feeling as well- that way you're still giving this guy control of your emotions. As for your other friend, who you like, you could try bringing up lgbt topics around him and gating his reacti ---------- Post added 24th Dec 2011 at 08:23 AM ---------- *reaction, apologies for the cut-off post. Is he among the people who know you're bi? That might be a good starting point for a conversation about lgbt issues. I hope you find some holiday cheer, regardless.
I'm struggling with holiday cheer too. The limited list of people I'm out to doesn't nearly cover them I'm going to see and I just don't want to slip up to certain people... For me, Christmas is about Christ, so I try to keep my focus on Him. But if you're not a Christian, is there something you can focus on other than what your 'friend' did to you? Having been betrayed by a dear friend I can totally relate to how you're feeling right now and know how hard it is. But is there anything?
Thanks everyone. And Eli, no the guy I'm crushing on doesn't know I'm bi. I'm planning on coming out to him next year, preferably after the summer since I work with him a lot, and don't know how he'd take it yet.
